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“But I need the money…” she whispers after a beat, even though there’s an acceptance in her gaze. She expected this, and for some reason that scores a deeper cut into my flesh than the knife wound that sits there now. She knew something like this was coming. Pen hasn’t had it easy, but like with everything in her life, she handles it. The least I can do is the same. Drawing in a deep breath, I continue, loathing the fact that she’s so obviously been struggling these past three years. She’s thin, drawn, tired. She’s barely hanging on and I’m a bastard for making this worse for her. We’reallcocksuckers for making this harder for her.
“There’s more, right?” She jerks her chin and squares her shoulders. I nod.
“Jeb said that you are too valuable to be working behind a bar. That yourskillsare required elsewhere.” I try to hide my distaste, but fail. He’d talked about her like a commodity, like a piece of damn meat and that had angered me more than I thought it would. I’ve spent three years hardening my heart. Three years forgetting the girl I loved. It took me a long time to not think about her every second of every fucking day, wondering what she was doing with Jeb. Whether he was treating her well, whether he made her smile like we did, whether he loved her like I did, Ido. I turned my pain into anger. I fucked other women, I cut people,brokethem and didn’t fucking blink, but a couple of weeks in her presence and I’m questioning everything I’ve become.
“Malik Brov…?” she croaks, swallowing hard.
“No! Not him. I made sure of that,” I say fiercely.No fucking way. Not that man. Not him.
“What do you mean?” she snaps, confusion in her gaze.
“He offered a price for you, Pen, a high price that I paid for in blood,myblood.”
“What are you saying? I don’t understand.”
I undo my jacket and point at the stain of my blood. I lied when I said it’s only a scratch. The wound had to be sewn up, a two inch gash that fucking stings like a bitch. It’ll scar, just like all the rest. “Jeb cut me for disagreeing with him. I let him.”
“Zayn, oh my god!” She reaches for me then, cupping my face this time and I swear to fuck my knees almost give out at the tenderness I see in her gaze.
“Don’t do that. Don’t pity me. That wasmychoice. I knew the consequences of disagreeing with him. I’m used to it. ”
“Used to it—?” Her hands fall away, and I see her connecting the dots. I’m scarred not just from the knife fights I’ve been in, but from the years of punishment I’ve had to endure at the hands of Jeb. Blood ties, blood binds, blood weeps. Anyone else would be dead for the insolence, this is nothing. He cuts me, I get to see another day.
It is what it is.
The Breakers don’t know. They assume every cut is from a knife fight, and not me taking punishment for them, for any wrongdoing we make.
“So if not Malik, who?” she whispers.
“A deal was made with Grim,” Zayn explains.
“Grim?” Pen bites out, anger flashing.
“Yes, you will perform in the cage at her club with the other…”
“Strippers?” she spits, her gaze narrowing on mine.
I nod tightly. Believe me, I fought against that decision too. I don’t want her paraded like that, I fucking don’t, but it was the lesser of two evils. Grim might be a tough bitch, but she has some morals at least. She won’t let anyone touch Pen. She treats her girls well. She helped Asia and Eastern get out of a sticky situation with the King. Of course, she’d deny it. Grim hasn’t got to where she is today by being an open book. She’s secretive, private and an astute business woman. Beast is one of the handful of people on this planet that she truly trusts. Besides, whilst Grim gave Jeb the impression Pen would be stripping, there was a look in her eyes that told me that perhaps that isn’t exactly what she has planned, and I hope to fuck I’m right about that.
“Grim might have a reputation that precedes her, but I don’t believe she’d let anything happen to you—” I say, hating myself for even allowing this to happen.
“Fuck!”
Pen spins on her feet and strides over to the table, snatching up her mobile phone and the apple that sits there. It looks bruised and on the turn. I’d throw it away, but Pen clutches hold of it like it’s the last thing she has left to eat. Looking at her, reading between the lines, it probably is. I stride over to her, and rest my hands gently on her shoulder. She flinches, but she doesn’t pull away. Her head drops, and words fail me. I was always so good at finding the right thing to say. But now? Now I have nothing but hollow words that mean jack shit when all is said and done. After a beat, she lifts her head and locks gazes with me in the mirror opposite.
“I’ll do it.”
And even though she really doesn’t have a choice in the matter, that Jeb will force her regardless, I can’t help but ask myself why she’s agreeing to it. It’s a mystery I intend on getting to the bottom of, because if I’ve realised anything since returning it’s this: my uncle has something over her, and I intend on finding out what. York and Dax are on the same wavelength as me, and after Friday night’s fucking mess seem as invested in finding out what the fuck is going on. Being in Pen’s orbit again is affecting them both and causing issues between us all and what we came here to do.
Xeno, however… Well, let’s just say that he’s being a dick. He's determined to keep Pen at arm’s length. He refuses to back down. He’s single-minded in his goal. That’s what’s most important to him, and that fucking pisses me off because for a long time, it was the most important thing to me to. Not anymore.
“When do I start?” Pen eventually asks, turning to face me. I can see her mentally shaking herself. She used to do it a lot when we were kids. Pen would straighten her spine, raise her chin, and hold her shoulders back. Fierce, brave, fucking courageous.
Damn, I’ve missed her.
Ignoring the tightness in my throat, I dig into my jacket pocket and pull out Grim’s card. Pen takes it, her eyes flicking to the black card with gold lettering. “Call Grim. She’ll fill you in.”
“Fill you in on what?” A bubbly voice asks.Clancy.
