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I remember the scent of her fear whilst Leon cut her, and the groan of her pleasure when I sucked her pretty nipples into my mouth three cells over.
I remember her scarred and ruined back that I thought I’d be disgusted by, but instead only long to kiss, lick andsoothe.
I remember her pretty birthmark that I would do anything to make darken with bliss.
I remember her smart mouth and wonder how it would feel to shove my dick into it and have her suck me off like she did Jakub.
I remember the way she danced in the library, and the way she moved across the stage during the show.
Every bit of her, every little nuance, calls to me. It fuckingcallsto me.
All I see, hear and smell is her.Zero.
My woman.Ourwoman.
Jakub can pretend all he likes, but sheisours. She’s already brought Leon to his knees, and Jakub is so messed-up over her, he’s losing his head day by day. I’ve never seen him so unhinged. The man has barely eaten in weeks. He hardly sleeps, and his body is covered head to toe in wounds both self-inflicted and given. I bet One fuckinglovedthat. She’s been waiting for the moment to sink her claws in. I just hope to fuck he knows what he’s doing.
Wait, what the fuck am I saying? He hasn’t got a clue what he’s doing, that’s the whole point.
And now look at me, drunk as a vagrant trying to numb the feelings Zero evokes in me and failing miserably.Me, a man who can only feel something,anythingwhen he’s either feeding off the pain of someone else or fixing the wounds he made so he can do it all over again.
I’m feeling all this shit and I don’t know what the fuck to do with it. I don’t know what to do other than drown myself in a whisky bottle or five, or throw knives at the head of the cunt who touched what belongs tous.
“Jesus, fuck,” I mutter, feeling a sharp stab in my thigh that pulls me out of my thoughts momentarily. I peel my eyes open to find Twelve giving me an odd look, but before I can question what the fuck’s up with her or why a warm feeling spreads out from my thigh, my eyes drift shut and my thoughts splinter once again until I’m back in Thirteen’s room with Zero that day I’d stitched the wounds Leon carved into her ruined back. She’d been so still, barely making a sound as I sewed her back together, and with every stitch, I’d grown impossibly hard. God knows I had wanted to impale her with my cock. Instead, I’d gripped my dick and wanked off, coming all over her pretty tits.
Maybe it was that day when it happened.
Maybe that was the moment my damaged, fucked-up heart knew she was really, truly mine. Or perhaps it was when I stepped into the Room of Fantasies and saw the Baron abusing her.
No. Iknowwhen it happened.
It was the moment she died.
I fuckingfeltit.
I laugh, the room spinning like one of those rides at a carnival I was never allowed to go on as a kid because that would’ve given me a moment of fucking joy, and joy wasn’t something our father ever let us experience unless it was from hurting someone.
Randomly, more laughter bubbles up my chest.
It’s freeing.
Cathartic in a way I’ve never experienced before.
It’shonest.
I laugh, and laugh, and laugh as the truth of what this means unravels in my chest.
I’ve been trying to block it out for days now.
But I can’t do that anymore.
I don’t fucking want to.
Leon wasrightto protect her. Jakub iswrongto want her dead.
My laughter fades and with it a strange kind of calm settles over me, a peacefulness. I know what to do now.
“That’s it, just relax,” Twelve croons, and I force my eyes open, focussing on Twelve despite wanting to return to my memories of Zero and sober up there.
