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Chapter 14
Damon
When we arrive at Night Shift, the place is empty minus Candy and a few of my right-hand men. I’m a bundle of nerves—even though I have no reason to be. Well…sort of. I know I’ll be walking into a shit-show tonight. I wonder if Keira realizes what kind of dinner to expect tonight.
Whatever my brother wants, he is going to use Keira to get it, and that annoys me. More than that, it angers me to no end, because caring for her, letting her into my life, makes me feel like I have a weakness, and that’s something I’ve never experienced before—a weakness my brother will have no problem grabbing onto and using to prove a point.
I can feel the tension Keira carries seeping into my bones. She doesn’t like the man I am when we’re here, but it is what it is. I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
When we make it to my office, after I do my rounds, I close the door behind us, sighing in relief. There is so much shit that needs to be done, new girls to be selected.
I need to talk to Toni and Dave and set up a meeting with all my men to discuss keeping post, since clearly it’s a fucking issue being that my brother got his hands on Keira in our establishment. My head is spinning, and yet the only fucking thing I can focus on is this stupid dinner with my sadistic brother—and the fact that my hands will be forced into playing whatever game he has up his sleeve.
“Umm…” Keira clears her throat, interrupting my thoughts.
I lift my gaze to hers from where I sit behind my desk. She is in her spot on the couch—where she sat the other day…though it seems like forever ago. I’ve been on edge since our conversation earlier, and I’m certain she can feel it—her facial expressions confirming it.
“Yes?” I try to keep distaste from my tone. Her dark brown eyes soften me. She looks at me like I am her entire world, and I can’t let her down—not today or tomorrow, never.
“We didn’t…” She stumbles over her words, her teeth worrying her bottom lip, “we didn’t use a condom, and I’m not on birth control.”
Fuck. The thought never occurred to me. Then again, I wasn’t focused on anything but making Keira feel good.
“If you’re worried about catching something from me, you don’t have to be. I’ve never fucked anyone without a condom, and I get every woman screened who works here.”
“You’ve slept with every woman here?”
I lick my lips, not really wanting to discuss this with her. She’s sensitive, far too sensitive than I have the patience for right now.
“No. I haven’t slept with every single woman here. But I don’t think it matters how many women I’ve slept with now that I’m with you.” I lift a brow.
Shame fills her eyes. “Okay. I’m sorry.” Her apology is full of heart, and I know she is just concerned with my feelings for her, and maybe a little worried I’ll find someone else. But she has no idea what last night meant to me, or what every day being in her presence means.
“Don’t be, but don’t ask questions we both know you don’t want answers to. I’ve slept with a lot of women. I have a lot of experience, but you have one thing they don’t.” I pause briefly, the words settling to the inside of my cheek.
I have a lot of experience, but you have one thing they don’t. “My heart.” I pause, panic seizing me.
“What’s that?” she asks, taking a seat at the front of my desk.
I’m not ready for this moment—not even fucking close. I care for Keira, I want to protect her, but love her? I’m not sure I’m ready to admit it.
“Nothing, baby. Nothing. Forget I said anything.” My voice is rough, and I hope she can’t tell how raw I’m feeling. Because if she notices, if she pries, I’ll have no choice but to say something that may hurt her.
Her face falls at my response, as if she was expecting me to say something else. “Okay…and what about a baby? Unprotected sex leads to babies, and I don’t know what your thoughts on children are.”
My thoughts on children? They’re nonexistent.
The thought of having a baby couldn’t be farther from my mind. Just imagining it seems odd. I don’t think I can. However, for some reason, I like the idea of Keira’s belly growing round and her breasts getting heavy with milk. Beyond that, I just don’t know. A child…in my world…
It’d only be another person to protect—another person to hide from my enemies.
I’m about to give her some generic asshole response—like we’ll worry about it later, or we’ll take care of it when the time comes. But seeing her worried face, I know I need to do better. I need to be better than that…for her.
