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8
Samantha shook her head at me, her eyes misting slightly. “I still cannot believe you’re really here Callie! I never thought you would come back.” she wiped a stray tear from the corner of her eye as she surveyed me from where she sat cross legged on her bed.
I sighed, leaning back in her computer chair. “I know, neither did I, although, I have to admit, now that I’m here, it just kind of feels right.”
Her face brightened, her eyes widening. “So, does that mean your gonna stay this time? What about your job at the bookstore?”
I sighed, swiveling around like we used to do as teenagers. “Geez I don’t know. Eugenia gave me a two month’s leave of absence, but I had to give my apartment up. I don’t really know what I want to do yet. I like New York, but Durango is home, and I’ve missed it.”
Samantha studied me with her too wise brown eyes. “You’re afraid that if you stay…people will start talking about what happened when you were seventeen, huh?”
I shrugged. Meeting my friends’ eyes, I said, “I think my bigger fear is that it’s going to happen all over again, and the small dream I have of staying here forever will blow up in my face.”
Samantha had always been mature for her age, and as she studied me, I had the feeling she had her own special abilities, like being able to look deep into another person’s soul.
“Has it happened since you’ve been back?”
I sighed and nodded. With a deep breath, I plunged head first into the story about waking up with a little puppy nudging my hand. I told her about the feelings I had felt, and about finding out who the puppy was and how he’d come to be in my parents’ house. At the end of my story, I was again a blubbering idiot, with tears rolling down my face, and snot built up in my nose.
Samantha herself had tears streaking her face as she cried softly. “Oh god, I’m so sorry Callie. I loved that dog, and I know how much you loved Lettie too.”
I chewed my lip, willing the tears to stop. “I just wish I wouldn’t have ignored her so much these last few times I visited. I was just so damn scared I wouldn’t be able to hide my…curse.”
Samantha went into the bathroom that adjoined her bedroom-a pool room attached to the back of her parents’ house that had been converted into a mini apartment for her-and returned a moment later with a box of tissue. “You can’t beat yourself up over it, babe. And it’s not a curse. It’s a gift, and I wish you would realize that.”
I stood and paced across the room, looking over the pictures of Sam and I together on our horses. Goosebumps rose over my skin, and a chill ran down my spine. looking at us, two happy, fun loving teenage cowgirls enjoying our youth, I felt bitterness wash over me.
“It’s a god damned curse Sammy, and you know it. I blew it that summer, I let everyone see how damn crazy I was, and it ruined everything.”
Coming to stand beside me, Sam rubbed my back. “It didn’t ruin everything, it just changed it, that’s all. A bump in the road, you know. I still think it’s a gift, and you’re the most special person I know.” Her voice broke on a soft sob, and I glanced over my shoulder with concern. Suddenly, I had the feeling this wasn’t all about me.
“Samanth Willits, you had better tell me what’s bothering you right now. Enough about my silly life. I can tell somethings wrong, now out with it.”
Sam choked back another sob and looked away. After a few seconds, she had composed herself enough to squeak out a few words, which took my breath away. “Callie, I’m pregnant.”
I blinked several times stupidly, searching for the right words, but unable to find them. my brain was so fuzzy I could barely comprehend what she was saying. “Okay…um, congratulation?” I knew my face looked as uncertain as I felt.
Samantha’s chin wobbled and suddenly she was in my arms, great big sobs wracking her body. I rubbed my hand soothingly over her dark blonde hair, and for once, I wished my gift worked on humans too. If only I could calm her down the way I could an animal. I didn’t know how to act, what to say. Gently, I maneuvered us to the bed, and once we were both sitting, I pushed her away a little, and tilted her face up.
“It’s okay Sammy. Now, just…tell me what happened, well, no I think I’ve got that part down, just tell me who’s the father, and how you came to be pregnant. Didn’t you guys use protection?” now I sounded like a hypocrite. Not long ago I had lost my mind over a good-looking cowboy and slept with him without protection. A dumb thing to do, but obviously I wasn’t the first or the last person to do such a thing.
Sam swallowed, wiping at her tears and blowing her nose loudly into a Kleenex. “Well, it was…wasn’t the first time it happened, and I just, I don’t know, I’m just so damn stupid!”
“No, no you’re not Sammy. You’re one of the smartest people I know, I mean, didn’t you just graduate with your Bachelors in Science or something?”
Samantha let out a small laugh. “Yeah, something like that. But still, Callie, I live in my parent’s pool-house, for crying out loud. I don’t even have a real job yet.”
“You have a job. A real cool one too.”
Sam smiled patiently at me. “Working at the museum is cool, yes, but it’s not a real job. It’s not what I got a degree for.”
I shrugged. “Okay, but still you just graduated not that long ago. So, tell me who the father is.”
She winced, and I thought, oh this is going to be bad. “Well, you remember Steven Graves, don’t you?”
I tilted my head to one side, trying ineffectually to recall a face with the name. “Uh…the name sounds familiar.”
She frowned. “You remember the summer we turned sixteen, and we rode in the drill team?” when I nodded, she continued. “Okay, well, do you also remember the really hot cowboy that was riding bulls that summer, the one who tossed us his hat?”
