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“You’ve only just got the patch. Maybe you should talk with your dad,” Zach says.
“No. Jay will handle this from his end, and he has Sparky and my dad if he needs them. My dad didn’t step down just to step back in.”
“He’d understand.”
Looking up at him, I say, “It’s not happening.”
This is on me now and I will do it my way. My dad handed down the patch because he believed in me. I’m not going to fall at the first hurdle.
Chapter Sixteen
Holly
It’s amazing how your life stops but everything around you carries on, not caring that your inner turmoil grows darker by the day.
“Tea, Holly?”
Robotically stretching my lips into a smile, I hold my empty cup out for Rayna, and she pours me an imaginary tea. Taking an imaginary sip, I murmur my approval and put my pink plastic cup down. Her tea set is spread out on the blanket, and she goes on to give tea to her dollies, as I look around the club. It’s a rarity I see Myles and Emma without Penelope. He rubs her growing stomach and presses kisses on her neck. He’s always so open with his affection for Emma, as are most of the other brothers with their old ladies.
It's been two months since Leo and the others were sentenced to eighteen months in Bolton Corrections. Even if he had had been around, I doubt he’d be openly showing me affection. Our deal would probably be the same with no progress.
“Holly!”
Jumping, Rayna’s tugging at my shirt.
“What is it?”
“We see Daddy now?”
Turning my phone on, I see it’s nearly time to leave. Shit. I pack her tea set away into the little hamper and we head for the house. It doesn’t take long before the prospect knocks on the door to hurry us along. On the days we visit Leo, we hang around the club. The rest of the time, we spend most of our days at the cabin. Making sure Rayna’s looking her best, we head outside.
Aspen’s already waiting in the car, and I buckle Rayna into her seat and climb in beside her.
She looks over her shoulder and smiles. “I thought Shane was gonna have to come find you.”
“Yeah, sorry. We got carried away at our picnic.”
“It’s all good. We have some time.”
The drive is quiet as usual and while Rayna is overly excited to see her daddy, I’m a bundle of nerves. The last couple of visits, there’s been so much to be said but I always leave without a word having left our mouths. It’s almost like the connection we’d built before he was arrested never existed. But every time I walk into the visiting room and lay eyes on him, I’m sucked back in. I’m happy to just be in his presence. I miss our nights together and I miss him.
Libby and Nina, along with Sebastian, are already at the prison when we arrive. Aspen jumps out and joins them. Shane climbs out of the car, but he doesn’t join us. He stays outside. He’s our driver and that’s it. Keeping a tight hold on Rayna’s hand, we sign in and it’s a drag. By the time we’re allowed into the visitation room, Leo’s already sitting at a table underneath the window.
Rayna tugs on my hand, wanting to run to her daddy. I tighten my hold on her, needing her as a barrier as I weave through the tables, and not wanting her to get near any of the other inmates. Leo was in two minds about letting her visit him in this place, but I reminded him she’s growing so fast now, and it wasn’t fair on either of them to miss out.
Nina and Sebastian settle in with Zachery and Aspen with Mason. I don’t see where Libby is with Dex before I’m passing Rayna over to Leo.
“Hey, sweetheart. You good?” he asks her.
“Yep, yep, yep.”
He looks to me and I nod in agreement. I know he gets updates from his mom and dad and anyone he visits with, but he always seems to fully relax when he hears it from me.
“How have you been doing?” he asks me.
“Fine.”
It’s automatic, as it is every other time he asks. There’s no point in telling him how I really feel. There’s nothing he can do from here.
