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I fight off a frustrated sigh. The cute librarian’s continuous attempts to help me are one of the highlights of my week.
This is what happens when I try to impress her. I just fuck it all up.
Ask her out.A voice taunts in the back of my mind.
The urge has never been stronger as I follow her back to the checkout desk, my eyes briefly hypnotized by the sway of her skirt against her knees. She’s always wearing skirts and dresses.
Like she knows how they torment me.
For months I’ve been coming to this library. At first, I showed up for the writers’ group on Thursday nights. Then I came in on a Sunday and realized I’d never written more in one sitting than that day.
So it became a habit. Sunday afternoons are writing and research days at the public library.
They’re also the days I plan how I’ll eventually ask out Summer.
Learning her name wasn’t hard. She wears a name tag, always pinned to the neckline of her outfit. The place my eyes seek out after they’re done tracing over the long dark lashes and the sinful curve of her mouth.
Today, she has on an orange lipstick. What I wouldn’t give to look in the mirror and see smears of that color on my mouth. Down my neck. Across my chest.
Wait till you get home, I tell myself.
When I’m at my place, late at night, imaging all the things I want to do to the sassy librarian is my favorite pastime. But playing out the fantasies when she’s scanning my library card seems disrespectful, bordering on creepy.
“Everyone is out. This is the final straggler.” A guy in a uniform leans against the counter, smiling at Summer like they’re good friends.
Maybe they are friends. That’s fine. I like the idea of Summer having friends. People she can rely on.
As long as friendship is all it is.
Ask her out now, the greedy part of my brain murmurs. But I hold myself back. Not yet. Not until I have my ace card. Not until I know she’ll say yes.
I’m not the type of guy to badger a woman. When I ask Summer out, if she tells me no, then I’ll accept it. It’ll be hard to give up on the idea of us together. The future where every one of her smiles is for me.
But I take a woman’snoseriously.
So my goal is to make the word yes so much more appealing.
Doesn’t help that I suck at flirting. Pissing people off comes more naturally.
This sensation, the craving I have for her to like me, is new. Normally, I find the world easier to deal with if people just leave me alone. But I don’t want Summer to leave me alone. I want her to walk up to my stack of books and give me her sweet smile and angry eyes as she practically begs to help.
Only now that I’ve shown my understanding of the library’s cataloging system, she might not bother me anymore.
I want her to bother me.
“This is quite a stack of books.” The scanner in her hand beeps as she points it at the final barcode. “You shouldn’t carry them all at once.”
Maybe I should point out how I was able to carry them all up to the checkout desk on my own. Maybe then she’ll look at my arms and consider how strong I am.
That’s how flirting works, right?
But she’s talking again before I can make up my mind.
“It’s unsafe for you and for the books. What if you drop a few on your way out and trip on them?”
“He seems capable enough,” the security guard offers while backing away from the desk. The guy is probably worried I’ll ask him for help.
Yeah, no thanks. Me and any type of law enforcement donotget along.
