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But it’s always going to be secondhand knowledge. Whatever I can pick up from studying or watching the news or taking a trip. I may look the part, but it’s not a true part of me.
One more reason to be pissed off at my mother.
“They moved to America soon after they got married and had my mom here. But I guess she didn’t get along with them. All I know is she left when she got pregnant with me and my brother Leo. Cut off all contact. Changed her name and everything.”
Charlie straightens, keeping his earnest eyes on me. “But you reconnected, right?”
I turn back to the bedroom, not sure what kind of emotions will show on my face. “Yeah, I knew her. I found her a year before she died. So there’s that, at least.”
But I could have had twenty-nine more years. I could have had her love and my history.
And I could have had more than just her.
“Too late to meet my grandfather though. He died in the nineties.”
Wai Po showed me pictures of a stern-looking man. Would he have been cold with me? Or could I have gotten him to smile the way I’d gotten my grandmother to those last few visits?
“I’m sorry. That’s rough.” Charlie appears next to me now, but despite his size, I don’t feel crowded. His presence comforts me.
“I missed out on a lot of time with my family.” Admitting that hurts, but Charlie needs to know how important this next year is for me. “I don’t want that to happen with Leo.”
“I understand.”
ChapterFifteen
CHARLIE
“You want me to what?” Luna gapes at me from across the pizza box.
I wipe my greasy fingers on a napkin and try to keep my voice lighthearted yet reasonable. Selling people ideas is what I do. This should be easy. Just another day at work.
“I want you to adopt Pig.”
My knuckles let out a light series of pops as I crack them, trying to eradicate some of my nervous energy.
This weird requirement could implode the whole arrangement.
“It’s been weeks,” Luna points out. “She’s probably already in a new home.”
“She’s not,” I say with confidence, though not much happiness. “I texted Paige earlier. She asked Cole, and he said no one has claimed her. Pig still needs a home. Why not here?”
“This…why are you asking for this?” My future fake wife crosses her arms and leans on the table. I’m briefly mesmerized by the way her dark hair swishes forward in a straight curtain. “You can get a dog if you want to. I don’t care.”
“Pig doesn’t like me,” I point out. “She needs to be your dog. But I’ll help you take care of her. Maybe she’ll warm up to me at some point, but you need to be a part of this.”
“You’re not making any sense, Charlie!” Luna stomps to her fridge and comes back with a beer, screwing the top off with a quick flick of her wrist. “I’m asking you to devote more than a year of your life to me, and you don’t want money or concert tickets or favors. You just want me to adopt a dog! Where is your head right now?”
Not completely sure, but when this idea came to me, it just felt right.
Like saying yes to Luna’s proposal.
Still, this take-no-shit woman is not someone to let things go without an explanation, so I come up with one on the fly.
“Okay, it’s like this. You may think this marriage thing is a burden for me, but it’s not. I’m going to live in your house rent-free, no job, and just ponder my future. That’s going to get boring quickly. I need some kind of responsibility. Some regular tasks to take care of during the day to keep from becoming a couch slug.”
“Which brings us back to you adopting Pig. She’ll be your dog.” Luna takes a sip of her beer, and I try not to imagine tasting the hoppy liquid on her lips.
My mind scrambles for more reasoning. “No, see, what if on this journey of self-discovery, I realize travel is what I want? Or living in a different country? It’s difficult to cross oceans with a dog.” I meet Luna’s gaze. “You bought this house. You’ve set down roots here. You want to stay in Nashville.”
