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I licked my suddenly dry lips nervously.
I knew that. Dash had told me he loved me in the bathroom after I'd gotten back. And rationally I knew he'd only said those horrible things to me because he'd been hurt and scared. I knew all that. I still wasn't quite ready to face him. Not when I still felt so raw on the inside. He could say something harsh and I didn't think I had it in me to deal with it.
"Can I take a shower now and pee?" I asked in a shaky voice.
Holy cow, stop talking about pee, Ariel Kimber!
"No," he stated firmly.
Fuck.
How did I know he was going to turn me down? Because he was Quinton, that was how.
I squeezed my eyes shut tightly and sucked in a deep breath. I knew why he was here, so what the hell was I waiting for. Hadn't I told Rain that he'd never let it go until he got what he wanted? That was the honest to goodness truth.
"Annabell is dead," I whispered in a dull, lifeless voice. I kept my eyes shut so I wouldn't have to see the reaction in his at hearing my words. "Adrian slit her throat right in front of me. I was covered in her blood. She told me she didn't like me, but she was on board with what I was doing because it would do good things for the rest of the women. She'd actually been good to me, and for the first time I didn't hate her. I couldn't hate her, she just seemed so damn sad and pathetic that I couldn't fucking do it. Then he slit her throat because of me and I... Her blood was all over me, all over my face, covering me, and no one tried to stop it because they all knew it was coming."
My voice cracked and I had to stop for a second. The tears had already started to fall, and one came down right after the other.
"Fuck," Quinton hissed.
I hiccupped. "Marcus knew. He knew and he sat there and watched. They filled the bathtub up with all of their blood, all of my blood, and Marcus undressed me and put me in the tub while I was passed out." I was speaking so fast my words were meshing together and were probably hard to understand.
Quinton must not have had a problem, because he growled angrily, "What the fuck? He took your fucking clothes off? Did he touch you? I'll kill him. I'll kill them all. How the fuck could he do that shit to you when you're like a daughter to him? Fuck, Rain is going to lose his mind."
My eyes opened and I stared at Quinton. Gone was the compassion and the sadness. He was angry and there was a certain look in his eyes I'd never seen before. Murderous. Deadly.
"Did you hear what I just said?" I whispered in shock.
His eyes narrowed on me and he snarled, "Yeah, babe, I heard you. Why do you think I'm so pissed? But you don't need to worry, because we'll deal with Marcus fucking Cole."
I shook my head from side to side in angry jerks. He had to be joking right now. The tears stopped falling and my hands balled into fists.
"Quinton," I said in a slow, deliberate drawl so he wouldn't be able to mistake any of my words. "Annabell is dead and it's my fault. I'm a monster. I just sat there and watched her die and I did absolutely nothing to stop it. If I hadn't picked up that phone and called Adrian to tell him I wanted to join them finally, then she'd still be alive. It's all my fault. I'm just as responsible as—"
Quinton leaned in until our noses were almost touching. In a voice vibrating with rage, he snarled out, "Shut the fuck up, Ariel. You just shut the fuck up right now. I don't want to hear any more bullshit like that come out of your mouth ever again, otherwise we are going to have serious problems, you and me. I don't give a fuck about Annabell, and I could care even less that she's dead."
I flinched at his words and tried to move my head away from him. He didn't let me get far. Quinton grabbed a hold of me, threading his fingers through the hair at the back of my head and dragging my face right back to where it had been half a minute ago. It hurt, but I kept my features smooth so he wouldn't see the pain I knew he didn't intentionally cause me.
"I don't care that you don't like to hear it, it's the honest to goodness truth. Is this what's got you so fucked up in the head and looking like you're dead inside? OverAnnabell?"He spat her name out in disgust, like he couldn't get the taste out of his mouth fast enough. "Fucking seriously, Ariel? There's not a man in this house who will give a fuck that bitch is dead. Not a single one. And that includes your father and Dash's father. If you ask me, karma came to call and the bitch finally got what she deserved. If that doesn't work for you then think about it in terms of her finally paying off a debt that she owed to our goddamned family. And nothing—"
I tried to turn my head away from him. His fingers in my hair gripped tighter and I whimpered. He didn't loosen up and the flames in his eyes flickered dangerously.
"No, damn it. You listen to me and you listen good, because I am not repeating this bullshit. It is absolutely not your fault that a piece of trash is dead. It's the Council's fault and it's her own goddamned fault. She practically sold herself to those assholes, and there are consequences for every action we make. These were her consequences for crawling into bed with those animals. Fuck them and fuck her. And, no joke, Ariel, fuck you too if think you're to blame for anything that happened to that woman. You can tell the others or not about what happened to her, I'll leave that up to you, but I promise you it won't make a lick of difference to any of them. Hell, some of them might even be relieved she's dead."
He let go of my hair and swiftly moved off the bed. "Hurry up and pee." He smirked at me when he said the word pee, like he thought I was the most amusing thing he'd ever seen before. "And then we'll both take a shower together. I've decided I prefer to take my showers with you since you let me fuck you up against the glass, and nothing feels better to me than the feel of your pussy trying to strangle the life out of my dick when you come on it. These last two days while you were asleep, and then the day before because you were gone, I've had to shower by myself and I've learned I don't much care for it. I figure I'll give you time to piss on your own because you won't want me in there watching you, but I'm not giving you that much time, so you better get your ass out of bed and get a move on it. I'm going to run downstairs to let everyone know you're up and that you'll be down after your shower, and then I'm running right back up here to shower with you. I don't give a fuck that your dad will know what's about to go down in the shower when we both come out with wet hair. He'll have to get over it, and frankly so will you. I'm not going without you for another day. And you better damn well get used to me showering with you, because it's going to be the new norm around here."
He put his fist in the messy blankets on the bed and leaned into me. His lips brushed against mine in a sweet kiss that lasted a couple of heartbeats before he pulled away from me. He shoved his hands into the front pockets of his jeans and walked out of the room like he didn't have a care in the world and I didn't just confess something horrible to him. Like he hadn't just ordered me to shower with him from here on out because he enjoyed fucking me in the shower and hadn't liked going without.
I watched him leave with a heart that felt only slightly lighter than it had in days.
I understood why he felt the way he did about Annabell, but none of his words sunk in with me. She'd honestly never really wronged me. She'd wronged my family before I'd ever even met them and left her mark on them, making them less than whole when I came into their lives. She hadn't liked me and I hadn't liked her. But still... no one deserved that.
Quinton could say whatever he wanted to say about her and how much he thought she deserved what she got. That was okay, he was entitled to his opinion. They all were, and I knew there were several of the guys who would certainly feel the same as Quinton. And that was okay too. But they hadn't been there. They hadn't experienced what I had, witnessed what I had, and it wasn't the same. What I'd been through wouldn't leave me any time soon, there was no getting around that.
I made a decision right then and there. I wouldn't let it affect the rest of my life. I would keep it locked away inside my heart. I'd never forget it, but I wouldn't allow it to hold weight over how I interacted with my family. I hadn't done wrong by them when I'd gone after Romero, I knew it in my heart even though some of my actions involving them had been questionable. Like, say, Quinton for all the talk he'd done at me about not lying about anything, and how we all needed to be honest with each other in order for our relationships to work out, well, he went right along with my idea of keeping the truth from the rest of our family until it was too late. He'd been all for it, and I hadn't even had to work to convince him. I wasn't the only one to blame for my actions, because we all knew Quinton could have put his foot down and stopped me, but he hadn't. He'd trusted me and let me do what needed to be done to protect our family. For what felt like the first time ever in our relationship, we'd felt like partners in this, actual partners, and I wouldn't trade that for anything in the whole world.
Some part of him, a large part, had to have agreed with what I was doing, or he wouldn't have went along with it. As much as Quinton wanted to protect me, he had six other people besides me that he needed to look out for and take care of as well.
