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“No, what? Tell me. What had you worried?”
Ann sucked in a breath before starting their walk again, her hands shoved into the pockets of her overcoat. “The last time I was at your place, I may have said some things.”
“You said you loved me,” Lila stated bluntly. She wasn’t going to shy away from it. She hadn’t returned the sentiment, mostly because she’d been too surprised to even consider it at the moment. But she’d had time to think between then and now, time to wonder.
“I did,” Ann whispered. “And I do. Love you, that is.”
Lila’s cheeks warmed and turned red, and it wasn’t because of the biting cold air. “I was surprised when you told me.”
“It kind of slipped out.” Ann sighed. “I’m sorry about that.”
“How long?”
Ann shrugged. “Probably a while now. I didn’t want to think about it. I didn’t want it to be a competition, I think, so I didn’t want to think about it.”
“And it’s not a competition?” Lila questioned, turning the block to start down the long way around the hospital.
“It’s not. All that worry for nothing.”
Lila chuckled. “I’m glad it’s not. It just…there’s something about you that I can’t get enough of.”
“What?” Ann faced her, dark eyes curious and cautious.
“I don’t know. You’re so damn full of passion, you know? It’s insane sometimes how you manage to bottle it up inside you, and when you release it—it’s like being consumed.”
“Consumed? You’re speaking nonsense now. I do not consume.”
Lila giggled before sending Ann a heated look. “Oh, you do. Like right now I’m betting if we found a quiet place, you’d fuck me into oblivion even if it was just for a quickie.”
“Don’t tempt me,” Ann muttered.
“Exactly my point.” Lila knocked her shoulder into Ann’s. “I love that about you. It’s consuming.”
“I guess,” Ann sighed.
“No guessing about it. You, Ann, are one sexy woman, always wanting to please your partner, always giving more than you get, always pushing the limits of how many times you can make me come in a few hours.”
Ann’s cheeks were bright red. “All right, I get it. You can stop now.”
“Fine.” Lila laughed again. “But I did bring you out here for a reason.”
“Yes, to break up with me.”
Lila grimaced. “No, not to break up with you. I did want to talk to you about me adding in another longer-term partner, a girlfriend this time.”
“You’re asking me permission to date someone else?” Ann’s eyebrows rose in confusion. “Why would you need my permission?”
Lila was stumped. She didn’t really need permission. It was more a courtesy, so Ann would know that Lila was regularly sleeping with another person, that her time would be far more limited now that she was dating two people instead of just one, that the quick “Can I come over after work?” texts might not be as feasible.
“I don’t want your permission, really. I want you to be okay with it.”
“Lila…” Ann stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. “This is an open relationship, a poly relationship. I don’t expect you’ll only be with me, ever.”
“Okay.” Lila breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay, well, then, I guess I want you to know because I want to keep the lines of communication open.”
“Good.” Ann smiled. “Let’s do that.”
“Right.” Lila stared awkwardly at Ann. It wasn’t that she thought Ann would refuse, ever, but she hadn’t expected the conversation to go quite like it had. She wished she could kiss Ann, that they were free and open enough to be able to do that, but she didn’t feel comfortable with that, and she knew Ann wouldn’t. They might live in the twenty-first century, but they still lived in rural western Kansas, and kissing a girlfriend could result in exposing themselves to the seedier homophobic side of life where they lived.
