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“But the thought of them being inside you has me all sorts of fucked up.” With jerky movements, Marcus rakes his hands through his dark, wet hair. “It’s weird because that whole voyeurism shit you guys were talking about… I thought that was me. I thought I was someone that liked to watch. Especially after the whole Lexi and Ayden thing on my couch last month.”
“Excuse me? What?” My eyes widen, and Marcus’ panicked eyes dart up to meet mine.
“Shit. I said that out loud, didn’t I?”
“Uh-yeah, and you’d better start talking, Mr! What Lexi and Ayden thing on your couch?”
Marcus releases a nervous laugh and sweeps through the water to lean back against the boulders at the rear of the cavern.
“Yeah, so… this thing happened. I was like asleep in the armchair, and when I woke up, I saw Ayden… uh.”
“Marcus, come on. It’smeyou’re talking to. No need to get sex shy now.” I remind him, and he smirks.
“Basically, Ayden was going to town with his head between Lexi’s legs, but it was over the top of her clothes. She wasn’t naked or anything. I knew when I woke to find them that I should just get up and leave, but then I remembered they were inmyhouse onmycouch, and I decided to stay and watch.”
“Holy shit! Why didn’t anyone tell me about this? This is gold!” I laugh. “Wait. Did Lexi and Ayden know you were watching?”
“Uh… well, Lexi kinda realised and panicked, but then Ayden pushed her back down even though he saw me there, and he finished the job.”
“And Lexi didn’t protest?” My eyes are wide with excitement. I can’t wait to give her shit about this.
“Not until afterwards. She kind of forgot I was there, I guess, and when I agreed with Ayden about how beautiful it was to watch her come undone, shit kinda got real. She got mad and stormed out, and Ayden ran out after her with his fucking boner pointing at Lexi like a compass.” Marcus chuckles as he remembers, bringing a familiar joy to his face that I miss seeing.
“Did you rub one out after that?” I tease, and he ducks his head as embarrassment washes over him.
“Uh-yeah. I don’t think I’ve had such a quick wank since I was thirteen.”
My laughter echoes around the small space, and Marcus joins me, his eyes bright and carefree.
If only it would last.
“It was easy to watch Lexi and Ayden because Lexi isn’t mine.” He glances away, not able to look at me any longer. “You’re mine, Rhee.” His voice is quiet. “I don’t think I can watch someone else bring you pleasure.”
Heat pricks my eyes at his admission. Even though I already expected as much, it still fucking hurts.
“I hate being me,” I admit as a sob escapes.
“What?” His head darts in my direction again before he pushes off the boulder and wades closer to me.
“I hate it, Marcus. I hate being this freak! This sex-crazed animal that needs abnormal things. I’m vile. The things I’ve done are vile. You and the guys have no idea of the things I’ve done just to get my fix. It’s sick, Marcus. Really sick, and I can’t fucking fix it. I’ve tried. So hard. So much therapy. So many self-help books and videos. Fucking rehab and retreats, and still I crave the need to get high on sex, uncaring of the consequences.” I shake my head and back up as he moves toward me again. “I was stupid enough to listen to some advice that made me think I could have a relationship, in a Rhys George kind of way. Find someone willing to share you, they said. Find someone who will let you explore your sexual desires, they said. Well, you know what, Marcus? Maybe such a thing doesn’t exist. Maybe those books about reverse harems are a load of bullshit. Maybe polyamorous relationships are a lie.”
“What are you talking about? You already have a group of guys willing to share you.” Marcus reaches for me, grabbing my hands so I can’t back up any further.
“But I don’t haveyou.”
There it is. The truth I was too scared to admit when I was seeing him last term. The truth I was too scared to admit to anyone, even myself. I wanted Marcus to be mine, and I still do.
“Shit, Rhee.” His eyes glaze over as his emotions take control. “I just don’t know if I can do it. I don’t know if I can share you, but it doesn’t mean I don’t want you. I fucking ache for you.”
I have no control over how I react. I fling myself at him and crash my mouth into his. Our teeth clatter as he accepts my onslaught, and we grapple each other in desperation. His hands find my arse, and he tugs me against his straining cock, my legs lifting to wrap around him, bringing him tight against my core.
I’m crying, I realise. Hot tears are rushing over my cheeks, falling onto his, and every now and then, a sob escapes my throat instead of the moan I mean to set free. The cold, rough surface of the cavern wall presses against my back right before Marcus releases my mouth and trails kisses down my neck. I arch back, giving him better access and feel his fingers hook under my bikini top to lower the fabric and let my aching pebbled nipple free. The cool air turns it rock hard, and a moment later, the molten heat of his lips close over the pink flesh as his tongue does a familiar dance.
My sob sounds more like a moan this time, pleasure coursing through me as well as something else. The need I feel is more than lust. More than horniness. It’s raw and aching and desperate. I’m terrified of this perfect moment ending. I don’t want to let Marcus go. Ever.
The grind of Marcus’ cock has me forgetting my fears and remembering how good he dicks me.
“Fuck me, Marcus. Please.”
