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No good reason.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” London said.
“London!” He slammed his fist on the table.
“What do you expect me to say to that,Dad?”
“I expect you to conduct yourself as a lady should. Using that type of language in front of your own father is beneath you.”
“Give me a fucking break,” she muttered under her breath. “My language is the last thing you should be concerned about right now. You should be grateful that I’m speaking to you at all, because I vowed I wouldn’t anymore.”
“And how would that be any different from the way things have been for the past few years?” Kenneth asked.
She huffed out a grunt. “You’re right. It wouldn’t be different.” London studied him as she took a long drink from her coffee. She set the cup down and assumed his pose, crossing her arms over her chest. “Did it ever cross your mind to askwhyI don’t speak to you?”
“Probably because Janette fed you some kind of nonsense about me being a bad father.”
London couldn’t help herself. She burst out laughing, and once she started, she couldn’t rein it back in. Even as several people from neighboring tables openly gawked at them, she still could not pull herself together. She imagined how the two of them looked—Kenneth scowling and confused while she belly laughed to the point that she could scarcely catch her breath—and it caused her to laugh even harder.
Once she was finally able to get a hold of herself, she used a paper napkin to dab at her eyes.
“Are you done?” Kenneth asked in his most condescending voice.
“I think so,” London said. She took another sip of her coffee. “I’m just floored that you think I needed my mother to tell me that you were a shitty father. Do you not realize that Janette is the only reason we have a relationship at all? I would have washed my hands of you a long time ago if not for her constantly in my ear about how I should be grateful to still have a father in my life.”
“She’s correct. And at least you have a father who took care of your needs, and not some deadbeat.”
“You do realize that making child support payments was the bare minimum, right? That doesn’t get you the Father of the Year Award that you obviously think you deserve.”
He jabbed a finger at the table. “I did more than just pay child support. You wore designer clothes throughout high school. I bought you a brand-new car your senior year. I offered to pay off your college loans and to add a porte cochere to your house, but you refused because apparently you’re too good for my money now.”
“You also skipped my high school graduation for a golfing trip,” London said.
“That was a business trip,” he countered. “And it was fifteen years ago. Get over it, London.”
“I’ve tried,” she said. She shook her head and swallowed down the lump of emotion that formed out of nowhere in her throat. “I have spent countless hours telling myself that it doesn’t matter. It’s in the past. Just move the hell on.”
She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth when she felt that son of a bitch tremble. She wouldn’t allow Kenneth to see how much this still affected her.
“I think it’s the constant gaslighting that makes it so hard for me to move on. You telling me how great you were as a father when I lived through years of being ignored, and that was before you and Mom divorced. It only got worse as you went through your parade of wives.” She toyed with the frayed paper napkin, studying it so that she wouldn’t have to look at her dad’s face. “If you would just acknowledge that you could have been a better father, maybe I could let it go.”
Several moments passed without a word from the other side of the table. When London looked up, the coldness of her father’s stare was enough to freeze her eyebrows.
“I will do no such thing,” Kenneth finally responded. “I gave you everything you needed.”
“I’m not talking aboutthings! See, this is the gaslighting! You’re a smart man, you know that I’m not talking about the physical things you bought me.” London held up a finger. “And since we’re on that subject, let’s be clear: Even when you gave me thosethings, it was never really about me. You bought me designer clothes because it made you look like a generous parent. The same goes for the car. It was something you could brag about to your buddies on the golf course. It was always aboutyou.”
His irritated expression bordered on disgust. “After all these years, you are still an ungrateful brat.”
“And you are still a clueless, unfeeling father,” London said. “I would have rather you throw me a ‘good job, London’ every now and again than to have a closet full of brand-name clothes and tennis shoes. I had to hear about your compliments secondhand.” She shoved her hands in her hair. “I didn’t realize you were even capable of paying attention to your children until you finally had a son. Then you suddenly became this ultra-involved parent.”
“Are you jealous of a nine-year-old?” The censure dripping from his words made her feel like a recalcitrant child, but London would not allow him to discount her extremely legitimate feelings.
“I’m not jealous of Miles. I’m disappointed inyou. It’s upsetting to see you treating Nina and Koko the same way you treated me. Except this time, your indifference is amplified when weighed against the amount of attention you shower upon your son. Stop treating your daughters like shit.”
He steepled his fingers and rested them against his lips. After several uncomfortably tense moments passed, he pointed at her and said, “I can only hope that you one day come to realize just how good you had it, London. Maybe then you’ll show me a little gratitude instead of constantly engaging in such vile behavior.”
“You know what? I’m not doing this.” She threw her hands up. “I’m just not doing it. One way of controlling my blood pressure is to cut down on stress, and this stresses me the fuck out.Youstress me out, Kenneth.”
