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She smiles and waves her hand like it was a simple mistake, but we both know it’s not. “I know I would be so nervous to walk all by myself down that aisle. With everyone watching? I’d be terrified of tripping!” Liza says with a laugh.
Well fuck. Now I am.
But I must do a good job hiding it because the other girls just refill their copper mugs and talk about how great it’ll all be.
“So, who is this boyfriend?” Gwen asks.
“Oh, yes! Show us pictures!” Hadley says.
“Yes,” Liza says, leaning in with a sharp smile. “Wherehaveyou been hiding him?”
“Hiding him?” Edie asks, laughing.
I shrug, sipping my drink. “I haven’t been hiding anything.”
“It’s her Zeke! Finally!” Edie says.
“Zeke?” Hadley says, biting her lower lip. “Sounds hot. And manly!”
“Isn’t everyone in Portland manly?” Gwen asks.
“Aren’t they all lumberjacks and professional picklers and circus performers?” Hadley says. This earns a laugh.
“So, which is he?” Liza asks.
“Ooh, remember when I hooked up with my aerial silks instructor?” Gwen asks. “Those Cirque du Soleil guys know where to put it.” Hadley and Edie dissolve into a puddle of giggles on the sofa.
“What are you laughing about?” Hadley says, nudging Edie. “You wouldn’t even know what to do with one!” At this, Edie flushes bright red and I gasp.
“Wait a second,” I say, holding up my hands.
“You’ve been living with Dar for how long now?”
“It’s only been six months,” she says.
“You’re going to marry this man and you’ve never… taken him for a test drive?” I ask, eyebrows raised.
She shrugs and both Hadley and Gwen giggle. Edie laughs as well, so I know we haven’t gone too far.
“I mean, I’ve definitely felt it—”
“Who needs another drink?” Liza interrupts, hauling ass to the kitchen.
I suppose I would do the same if a room full of women was talking about my brother’s penis.
“Look, we’ve donestuff.”
“Definestuff,” Gwen says, leaning in.
Edie shrugs and for a moment I’m not sure if I should maybe join Liza in the kitchen as well.
“Everything but the actual act.”
“Even butt stuff?” Hadley says, way too loud.
“Too loud,” Liza calls from the kitchen, shaking ice cubes as if to drown out the noise.
“Of course not,” Edie says, blushing even more.
