Page 106 of Definitely Not Him

“This isn’t living.” A lump rose up my throat. “Everything you do has to be planned with a schedule, and you can’t spontaneously do anything without it being a story. And I can’t either anymore.”

He stepped forward and caressed my cheek, but I shook my head.

“I’ve lost my job, my privacy, and with today’s stories, I’m on the verge of losing the will to live,” I said. “Nothing is off limits for them. Nothing…”

“You’re leaving me because of the press?” He narrowed his eyes.

“I’m leaving you because I just need time to myself, time without being with a royal.”

“I’m not a royal anymore.”

“Maybe not officially,” I said. “But you always will be to anyone who sees you. You’ll always be someone worthy of writing about, and anyone on your arm will be fair game, too.”

“You’re able to brush it off and go about your day,” I said. “I lay in bed awake at night and cry, replaying it all and wondering if they have a point.”

“You can learn to adjust to it.”

“Not if I don’t want to,” I said. “I don’t want to. And I think your sister coming here made that more than clear.”

“Priscilla was here?” He raised his eyebrow. “When?”

“Recently,” I said.

“What did she say to you?”

“Enough for me to see this isn’t for me.”

“My family is full of shit.” He clenched his jaw. “Every single one of them is terrible, her included.”

“Even terrible people can make great points.”

“We’re about to be parents, Chloe.”

“That’s why I drew up a brand-new co-parenting plan.” I held out a folder, but he made no move to grab it. “I’m open to negotiating whatever terms you may feel are unfair.”

“I’m not co-parenting my children with you, Chloe,” he said. “We’ll figure this out.”

“I already did.” I left the folder on the bed. Then I grabbed the handle of my suitcase and walked toward the door.

He grabbed my hand and spun me around. “What’s happened between our trip and now? You’re being ridiculous.”

“I read between the lines of your farewell statement.” I pulled my hand away. “I didn’t catch it at first, but it’s pretty clear now. You may hate your family, but they’re your fallback plan if your life here doesn’t work out. You didn’t say it explicitly, but I’m not Hazel. I know that what’s not directly written is silently implied, and I know that I wouldn’t be welcome there if you had to return.”

“Now you’re being even more ridiculous.”

“There’s a part of you—a very tiny part, that enjoys being in the spotlight, a part you can’t explain because it’s been a part of you for your entire life. You’re one foot in and one foot out, and it’ll only be a matter of time before you see me like they do, and I just want to protect my heart from that now.”

“Chloe, please.”

“Don’t follow me,” I said. “I’ll send you updates every week about the babies and I’ll turn on my tracker if my water happens to break, okay?”

He didn’t answer, and I walked into the hallway with him on my heels. Not heeding my request, he spun me around to face him.

“You’re all I care about, Chloe,” he said, clasping my hands. “I meant that.”

“Then keep your promise to always do what’s best for me. ” My heart cracked in my chest. “Put yourself in my shoes for five seconds and think about everything I just said…Then let me do what’s best for me.”

He stared at me in disbelief, and pain filled his irises as the seconds passed. Then he slowly let go of my hands.

I walked away before I could change my mind.

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