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“It’s a celebration, she should be there. But we can see how she is later.”
“If she changes her mind, I’ll stay here with her.”
Diesel nods, clambering off my bed. “The next few months are going to be tough…”
“I know. I’ll be here, I promise.” I’ll stop running.
“It’s okay to need some time, just… don’t shut me out, Kat.”
I nod.
A silent promise.
One I only hope I can keep.
* * *
“We don’t have to go, Mom,” I say, watching as she tries—and fails—to put her makeup on.
“I just… I’m so tired.” She lets out a weary sigh, her bottom lip wobbling.
“It doesn’t matter, we can stay in and have some girls’ time. I’m not bothered about the party.”
It isn’t like Ryder has texted me today. No flirty messages. No ‘how are you.’ Nothing.
If I didn’t know better, I’d say he’s avoiding me.
It annoys me how much I care.
“But everyone will be there. We should—”
“Hey, Mom. It’s okay.” I pull her into my arms and hold on tight, my heart breaking as her tears saturate my t-shirt.
“Gosh, baby. I’m sorry.” She pulls away, drying her eyes. “I’m a mess.”
“No, Mom—”
“It’s just so frustrating not being able to do the simplest of tasks some days. I really thought I was doing okay, you know.”
“I know.” I offer her a weak smile, gently helping her to her feet. “Why don’t we go and put on some trashy TV and binge on ice cream. I think there’s a pint of cookie dough in the freezer.”
“Sounds good. Maybe if I lie down for an hour, I’ll feel better and we can still go for a little bit.”
“Whatever you want, Mom.”
I get her situated on the couch, throwing a blanket over her legs and head for the kitchen.
Pulling out my cell, I quickly text Diesel.
Kat: Mom isn’t feeling so good, we’re going to stay here for a bit longer. I’ll keep you updated.
Diesel: Do you need anything?
Kat: No, I got this.
After our chat earlier, I realized Diesel is right. I can’t run every time it gets hard. Mom needs me. Diesel needs me to step up too. I can do this—I want to do it.
But as I grab the ice cream and two spoons and head back to Mom, I can’t help but think that it must be nice to have someone to lean on when things get tough.
