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‘You’re just like my father sometimes,’ she snapped, unable to help herself. ‘So damn patronising. Are you even listening to what I’m saying? Or is it because I’m a sheltered young woman you don’t think I know anything?’
Rafael was in his customary pose, sitting back in the chair opposite the desk, his long, muscular body stretched out, ankles crossed. Ostensibly relaxed and yet tonight something was different. There was a tension about him that needled her, that stretched her own temper thin and she wasn’t sure why.
Silver glittered in his eyes. He seemed cold tonight, the distance between them and their respective stations making the desk seem like an impossible gulf.
‘No,’ he said and she could hear anger in his voice. ‘I do not think that.’
Her emotions had always moved liked quicksilver and her anger faded as quickly as it had come, because somethingwaswrong, she could sense it.
She frowned. ‘Is everything all right, Rafael?’
His gaze flickered. ‘Yes. Why do you ask?’
‘Because you’re not usually this grumpy.’
He shifted in his chair, the tension around him gathering tighter. ‘There have been...some issues I have to deal with.’
‘I’m sorry. Is there anything I can—?’
‘Youarea sheltered young woman,’ he interrupted suddenly. ‘And therearesome things you don’t know anything about.’
An intensity vibrated suddenly in his voice, a rough quality that made her go very still, her heart thudding hard in her head.
‘What things?’ she asked, staring at him, her breath catching.
He looked back and for a long time neither of them moved, the air in the study aromatic with the remains of her cigar and the warm scent of Rafael’s aftershave drifting around her.
There was heat in his eyes, making her skin prickle everywhere.
Then abruptly he cursed, put down his tumbler of Scotch, pushed himself violently to his feet and walked out.
Lia swallowed, her head full of the look in his eyes as she’d turned to him downstairs. She’d wanted to see his face, wanted to see the truth and there it had been, that same look he’d given her that night months ago, his silver gaze full of desire. For her.
What if you weren’t meant for Matias after all? What if you were meant for him?
Her heart was beating far too fast and she felt breathless.
Meant for him, for Rafael...
The idea made everything in her pull taut.
Ever since she’d first seen him on the balcony all those years ago, he’d generated such a strong response inside her. Back then she’d only been seventeen and sheltered, and hadn’t known what it meant. He’d fascinated her, confused her, but even then part of her had known that the feelings she had for him were forbidden. That they should have been for Matias, not Rafael.
Her parents had ensured she spent time with Matias, organising decently chaperoned outings so the two of them could get to know one another. But he’d never seemed to display much interest in her. Their conversations had been stilted and awkward, both of them running out of things to say to each other.
She’d thought it would get easier between them, that they merely needed more time, but then those meetings with Rafael had happened and she’d become even more confused. Because conversation with Rafael had never been awkward or stilted. He’d never seemed bored by what she had to say and, unlike Matias, he was interested in her opinions.
She loved talking to him, loved spending time with him, and the more evenings she had with him, the more she wanted. She’d started resenting having to go on outings with Matias and on the days she did, all she could think about was that she didn’t have these long silences with Rafael. And she didn’t have to watch what she said with Rafael or be the perfect princess with Rafael.
She didn’t feel the same heady combination of excited and afraid that she felt when she was with Rafael, that sheonlyfelt with Rafael...
It wasn’t only physical desire you felt for him.
But her mind shied away from that thought. It felt too big, too dangerous. A teenage crush was far more manageable and really, that’s exactly what it had been. A teenage crush she hadn’t grown out of and a physical desire she hadn’t managed to control.
Except she would control it now, because she had choices now and a future that hadn’t been planned in meticulous detail for her by other people. She had decisions to make and she couldn’t let those decisions be dictated by some emotion she didn’t even have a name for.
She’d made that mistake three months ago and look what had happened.
