AllFreeNovel
Share Us
RC
Same as you. She wanted to know about Carol. Difference is,shetook me seriously.
Chapter 33
Louise
The taxi disappears down the lane, and Andrew picks up his holdall and follows me around the side of the house and in through the half-finished kitchen. I’m about to put on the kettle to make some tea when I think better of it, and fetch a bottle of Glenlivet 18-year-old single malt from the sideboard in the dining room. I pour a rich, thick finger of the amber liquid into a heavy crystal glass, and take it in to Andrew. The last time I touched either this bottle or the best crystal was almost five years ago, the Christmas before he left.
Andrew knocks back the Scotch in a single gulp, and holds his empty glass out to me. I go back to the sideboard to top it up, my concern mounting. I’ve never seen him drink like this.
I don’t normally bother with alcohol myself during the week, but I have a feeling I’m going to need it tonight. I pour myself a large glass of white wine and take both drinks through to the sitting room. ‘What’s happened?’ I ask, setting Andrew’s tumbler on the coffeetable in front of him. ‘What did you mean outside, when you said you’ve been a fool?’
He buries his face in his hands. ‘Oh, God. I don’t know where to start.’
‘Try the beginning.’
I sit down next to him, but for a long time, he doesn’t speak. His shoulders heave silently, and I realise with shock that he’s crying. I can count on the fingers of one hand the times I’ve seen him sob before.
My arms ache to reach out and comfort him, but I don’t feel I have the right. ‘Andrew, whatever it is, we can sort it out,’ I say.
He raises a despairing face to me. ‘Lou, I don’t think we can.’
What can he have done that’s so terrible? Is it something to do with work? I run through scenarios in my mind, wondering what could have reduced him to such despair. He’s made mistakes before, run with a story without checking every fact, made a bad call that put him and his crew at risk, but instinctively I know this is something more personal. News crews work in close quarters on the road, producers and reporters doubling up in hotel rooms, travelling together for days at a time. Adrenalin and alcohol are a heady combination. And this is the #MeToo era. Has he crossed the line? Is someone accusing him of harassment, or even sexual assault?
There’s a footfall on the stairs, and Bella appears in the doorway. She starts in surprise when she sees her father. ‘What’re you doing here?’
‘Hear you’ve been in the wars,’ Andrew says, getting up to give her a hug. No one but me would see the desperate misery behind his smile. ‘That’s quite the egg you’ve got there. How’s the ball looking?’
‘Ha, ha.’ She tucks her hands into the long sleeves of her grey T-shirt, and I realise I can see the outline of her ribs and collarbone beneath the flimsy fabric. She’s got sothin.
‘You all right, Dad?’ Bella asks. ‘You look a bit weird.’
He does look terrible: red-eyed, and drawn and grey beneath his summer tan. He’s putting on a good show for Bella, but his hand shakes when he reaches for his glass again, and consummate actor though he is, I don’t know how long he can keep up the performance. ‘My daughter spent the day in casualty,’ he says. ‘One day, you’ll understand how that feels.’
‘Back upstairs now,’ I tell Bella. ‘You’re supposed to be resting.’
‘Would you like me to come and tuck you in?’ Andrew asks.
Bella looks alarmed. ‘She’s sixteen,’ I say gently. ‘She doesn’t need tucking in. Go on up, Bella. Dad’ll say goodnight later, before he goes.’
Bella returns to her room, and I pour myself another glass of wine, deeply troubled by whatever’s going on with Andrew. The protective shock from Bella’s accident is starting to wear off, too, leaving me exhausted and emotionally drained. Today has brought back so many unhappy memories. I can’t wait for Bella to fall asleep, so I can sit by her bed and just watch her breathe.
‘She seems OK,’ Andrew says, as I return.
‘She’s awfully thin. I didn’t really notice it till I saw her in the hospital bed today. She’s lost a lot of weight in the past few months. Do you think we should be worried?’
‘Everyone looks ill in a hospital bed.’
