AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Chapter 9
For every action, there is an equal and opposite prank. ~ Phoebe’s rules for becoming a better person
Inearly run into Hailey and Suzie when they stop right inside the entrance of McGraw’s Pub as I’m following them into the bar the next night.
“What’s up?” I ask as I peek around them. My eyes widen when I see the place is packed. ‘Packed’ as in wall-to-wall people with every table taken, and a crowd three-deep at the bar.
“Hailey!” Sid shouts and waves at us from their table.
Once we reach them, Hailey wastes no time attacking. “What did you do?”
Wally is the picture of innocence. “Us? Why do you think we did anything?”
Hailey snorts and crosses her arms over her chest.
Suzie claps and squeals. “How fun! Is it like a dating thing? You’re the only men here, so I guess we get to pick out women for you.”
Sid, the old dog, grins as does Barney. Wally and Lenny, though, look like they want to strangle Suzie and bury her somewhere no one will find her. I know the feeling, although I have no idea how to hide a body. I’m pretty sure Wally and Lenny do, though.
“Maybe you shouldn’t antagonize the men who can break you in two with a flick of a finger.”
Suzie laughs. “Please. The uncles would never hurt me.” She bats her eyelashes. “Would you?”
“Define hurt,” Wally demands.
Suzie leans forward and plants her hands on the table. She isn’t looking at what she’s doing. Why would she start now? The beer mugs on the table shake and a coffee cup falls over.
“Suzie the menace,” Barney mutters. “Which reminds me … What do you call a nanny with breast implants?” He looks around but no one answers him. “A faux-pair."
“Stop trying to distract me. What did you do?” Hailey is not playing around. She is m-a-d. Mad.
The uncles all pretend to be super interested in their beer bottles.
“I got this,” Suzie says and taps the woman in a chair at the table behind her on the shoulder. “Hi! What are you doing here?”
“What am I doing here?” The woman looks Suzie up and down. “What are you doing here is the question. You don’t have a chance with the silver fox.”
At the words ‘silver fox’, Hailey growls. Her pops is a total silver fox. He may be twenty-some years my senior, but I would totally take him for a ride. Assuming I was up for taking rides with any man. But I am not interested in men. No matter how weak my knees go when Ryker touches me.
Hailey approaches the woman. “Why do you think you have a chance with the silver fox?”
“Duh.” The woman pulls out her phone. “It says right here he’s lonely and looking for someone to warm his bed at night.”
Hailey nabs the phone from the woman. She protests but Hailey holds up her hand to silence her. “Since when does McGraw’s Pub have a twitter account? And why is Pops’ picture the background image?”
I look over her shoulder and sure enough, Pops is smiling back at me from the McGraw’s Pub twitter page. The account has only tweeted once and it’s a doozy.
Please join me at McGraw’s for two for one drinks at happy hour. PS I’m lonely and looking for a woman who can keep my bed warm at night.
“What the hell? We don’t have two for one drinks at happy hour.” Hailey glares at the uncles. Personally, I would have been more concerned about them pimping out my dad but whatever.
“Can I have my phone back now?”
Hailey practically throws the thing at the stranger before stomping to the bar. “Good thing I didn’t bring Lola with me tonight.”
“Good. She’s gone. Now, you can tell me what Pops did.” Suzie scoots into the booth while Sid stands to find a chair for me to sit on.
“He put salt in my coffee,” Wally admits.
