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“You know what I am talking about, Niklas!”
“You think it's your fault she died?! Seriously? I know you're more rational than that, little siren, don't disappoint me.”
She frowns and shakes her head. “You.” My brows furrow. “You are my fault.” Now this I did not predict. “I'm the reason why this happened inside of you that day...”
“Don't fucking kid yourself.”
“Stop it!” she bellows. “You said yourself. That night... I was the trigger, I was the reason why.”
“You think you’re responsible for me?! I’m fucking happy, sweet little siren. I’m happy you’re the reason my demons finally found bliss. If it wasn’t for you… The path I was on was a destructive one, a turmoil made its home inside of me, fought never-ending battles, and people that didn’t deserve it were in the front line.” I sigh and continue, “I know you will deny it, yet I also know that your soul recognizes my words. I know that battle is consuming you too. You were my liberation, Suki, my demons revel in their freedom and I… I found you.”
“I…” She lays beneath me, her eyes wide, her mouth hanging open.
“I see it in your eyes, Suki. Your demons cry for mine, they want what I have, what they saw that night, what you did to your mother… they crave it all. You are in self-destruct mode, your soul will implode, pulling everything you are in a fucking dark hole, and when the fire is done consuming you, it will move on to the people that care for you.”
“Who?!” she rasps. “I’m alone, Niklas. If it implodes, the world will go on like nothing happened. There is no one waiting for me, no one missing me, no one cares!”
“You silly little siren. I thought you’ve seen it by now.” I shake my head and smirk. “I have made many violent threats against you, yet none of them taken to completion.” I pause, observing her, but there’s no realization in her eyes. “You were perfect, perfect material for my demons to finally let loose—to demand, take, hurt, destroy. You were perfect. But my demons recognized you, recognized your demons. We dance to the same song because we are legion and there aren’t many like us.”
There’s a faint shake of her head as her body bursts into goosebumps.
“It didn’t take me long to realize that the only reason I craved that destruction, doing all those things to women is because my demons were searching for you. The one that sang the song that triggered them all those years ago. They were starved and they wanted to devour everything and anything just to sate that hunger. Until you came back to me…”
Tears pool in her eyes and her chest shivers, but she swallows it all back. She knows that she will have to give in to her demons if she stays with me, if she accepts my words. Eventually she will, there’s no escape but death, because the hunger will get so strong, she’ll end up eating herself up.
I let go of her hands and guide her body to the right side of the bed,herside, as I know she enjoys falling asleep looking at the view. I lie down behind her and spoon her short, plump body that fits perfectly alongside mine. Her breaths slow down, the thumps of her heart ease.
“I care, Suki,” I whisper and feel the most subtle twitch in her body in response.
I’m almost certain I more than care, yet how could I admit something like that to me or her, when it just means that I will be throwing my fucking heart into the pit, unknowing if it’s going be burned or devoured.
I care…
