Page 18 of My Kind of Monster


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This is too much… I do not want to say more.

He’s acting like he wants to protect me, avenge me, but that’s ridiculous because I know, I know what lurks behind the shadows of his eyes. I can see the demons, and no matter how loud he is calling onto mine, I cannot fucking answer!

He had no scruples when he chased me through the woods. He is a hunter and I am his prey. There are many ways of catching prey—luring it with kindness is just one of them.

I’m bleeding again… I thought this wound would have been closed by now, but I guess that’s what happens when you get stabbed with a fire poker. I forgot that it hurt. Is that even possible? Apparently it is, or maybe it just melded with the other pains I’m feeling right now.

I look at the bath water and now it’s pink, slowly getting darker. I might actually need stitches… but then, if I wait long enough, with enough pressure, eventually it will stop bleeding. It always does.

He startles me again, putting his hand in the water and pulling the cord for the third time, draining most of it before filling it again. I appreciate the silence.

He hands me a bottle—shampoo. I squirt enough in my hands and lather my hair. I’m about to sink underwater to rinse, but I feel strong hands grabbing me under my armpits, lifting me out of the water before I can protest.

“The water’s dirty,” he tells me in that low, rough voice of his.

I have no other choice but hold on to him. He turns me to another bit of the bathroom that somehow I failed to see before. On the right-hand side of the bathtub, behind a wall maybe eight feet long, lies a view that might actually top the one of the bathtub. The shower. It’s tucked away in this intimate, dark space, only to feel like you're showering out there in the open with another massive floor to ceiling window.

He drops me on my sore feet, and I just stand there, taking in this beautiful image that should not exist. I’m not sure how long I’ve been trapped by it because I didn’t even realize he turned the shower on. It feels like rain. Summer rain.

Something is happening.

I can feel it. The air has changed. It’s heavier, charged somehow.

I dare to turn and he's naked behind me, joining me in the shower. I look at him, in his eyes again, and I see it.

An awakening.

I can’t explain it and I don’t want to, but I feel it in my bones. My body bursts into goosebumps instantly, and a shiver raises havoc through my spine, spreading fast throughout my whole body.

I feel like I’m going to hyperventilate. I take a deep breath, break eye contact and turn my back to him. Closing my eyes, I lean my head back and let the shower hit my face and for a few moments I allow my mind to take me back to my last vacation. Last summer, when on a hike, I accidentally found this amazing waterfall. I ended up stripping and bathing in it for over an hour, in the middle of the woods, just me and the chirping birds, the rustling of leaves, and the warm sunshine. It was an incredible day.

My daydream is broken by his fingers running through my hair. What the… is he rinsing it? I still, because this feels like something… it feels good, and I’m afraid that if I move, I’ll ruin it. Yet, I have to ruin it, I have to, this is not real, it’s manipulation. It always is.

“Wash yourself.” His tone is hard, giving me an order as he hands me another bottle—shower gel.

I’m confused because I have not washed my hair yet, but I hand him the shampoo either way. I pour some shower gel in my hand and place the bottle on the built-in shelves.

I feel his big, strong hands massage my scalp slowly, and I have to stop myself from moaning, from leaning into that touch. I have to remind myself who he is… Only when he starts rinsing the shampoo out of my hair do I realize that I've just been standing there, in a trance, and I scurry to wash myself.

He leans over, pushing me forward slightly, grabbing the shower gel from the shelf. His body, just for a moment, was pressed into mine and the skin he touched feels electrified, tiny currents running through me, and my nipples are instantly hard. My damn body betraying me again.

I hear the squirt of the shower gel, his palms rubbing together and then the magnetic power of his touch is on me. Instinctively, my back arches, my body moves forward, but he stops me. One hand on my stomach, holding me in place as he rubs my back.

This feels like the longest shower of my life and I both wish to stay and run.

His hands move down my lower back and my instincts are screaming at me to run. Not necessarily because I'm in danger, but because I cannot trust myself. His hand holding me with such gentleness and power feels like a subtle domination that only I could possibly understand, and it scares the living daylights out of me.

I grab the hand holding me in place and attempt to pull it off me as I push my body forwards, away from him. No use, he’s strong, but I try again. I pull on his hand with more force, twist my body away from his, but in the next second my face and body are pressed on the cold window and I cannot help but shiver with dread and heat at my predicament.

If we weren't in the middle of the woods, on a mountain peak, people could see me. Naked. Pressed against a window. Looking down at them.

The hand that was holding me by the stomach is now pressed between my shoulder blades, holding me still. All I can hear is his heavy breathing, and all I can feel is his body heat and his other hand sliding down on my naked ass.

I begin to struggle against his hold, but when his hand slides between my ass cheeks, reaching that puckered hole, I stop dead in my tracks. He moves it up and down, seemingly cleaning me, when in fact, I am feeling dirtier then when he started. The hand on my back pushes me harder onto the window, and the other one slides further down…

Shit!My cheek is pressed against the glass, my warm breath steaming it, and from the corner of my eye all I can see is his chest. His strong, wide chest, rising and falling in deep, controlled breaths.

His big hand reaches my pussy, and the steam disappears from the window. I can still feel the slippery soap on his hand as he rubs back and forth. He splits me open and washes between my lips and I know for a fact that the soap is not the reason why his fingers glide with such ease. He does not enter me though… no… he is playing with my mind.

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