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“If I were hiding, you’d never have found me. I’m just… chilling.”
“In the closest motel to the hospital Remi just so happens to be in?” My chest aches at the mere mention of her name. “Don’t even pretend like you don’t visit her when we’ve all left. I know you do.”
“So what?”
“So what? I want to know why. I get why you want to hurt me—”
“Do you?” I grit out. “Do you really?”
“You hate that I’ve dragged you here and you’re trying to throw your weight around. Trying to prove that I don’t hold the power.”
Lifting my hands, I push at his shoulders. To my surprise, he allows me the space and steps back. “Is that right?”
“Yes,” he sighs. “Now you need to do the right thing and own up to your mistakes.”
“That’s what Jaggers do, is it? Admit to their mistakes?”
“If you’ve done something wrong, yes.”
“So were you ever going to apologize for having our father killed?”
All the blood drains from his face. “W-what?” he chokes out.
“Oh, you thought I didn’t know.” My lip curls with disgust. “That I naively thought he randomly died all those years ago, just like my brothers do?”
He opens his mouth to respond, but no words come out.
“Well, it seems you’re not the only one with secrets, does it, Uncle.” I narrow my eyes at him. “So you tell me… tell me why you thought it was such a good idea to leave us short of one parent and then abandon us when the other fell apart at the seams?”
“He wasn’t the man you thought he was, Ace.” His voice is barely a whisper.
“No? So he didn’t put food on the table and look after us?”
“No, he was a liar and an abusive motherfucker.” Anger etches into his expression once more. “Do you have any idea what he used to do to your mother? Did you ever wonder why she turned to drink and drugs in the first place?”
“Do you have any idea what it was like for all of us after he was gone?” I spit. “When she fell apart and we had to fend for ourselves? Where were you then, huh? If you were so set on helping and getting rid of him, why couldn’t you help us then?” I roar.
Images of my brothers curled up under their dirty, threadbare sheets race through my mind, shivering cold because not only had they not had a warm meal inside them, but we had no money to heat the shithole trailer we were forced to live in.
“I tried, Ace. I fucking tried.”
“There were so many things you could have done to help. But you didn’t. You fucked back off to your privileged life and left us to drown.”
“She wouldn’t let me.”
“I’m sorry, what?” I ask, feeling like I’ve just been slapped.
“I tried,” he repeats more clearly this time. “She wouldn’t let me.”
“She was a fucking junkie, James. What kind of power could she have possibly had over you?”
He opens his mouth to confess but closes it almost as quickly.
“Oh no, you don’t come storming in here and not give me everything. This is my fucking life, I deserve the truth. If it weren’t for me, those two would have fucking starved to death along with her in that trailer. How could you have possibly made it any worse?”
“You could all be fucking dead.” His voice is a low rumble, a stark contrast to a few seconds ago. “I did everything I could. Am I happy that I had to leave you there? About not being able to do more? No, no I’m not. But I couldn’t risk the alternative.”
“This is fucked up.” I fist my hair, dragging my fingers against my scalp.
