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“It’s positive. You’re pregnant.”
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck!
“O-okay. Thank you.”
“Your levels put you at about six weeks, so it’s still very early. I recommend booking an appointment with your regular doctor to discuss the next steps.”
“Yes, of course. Thank you.”
He says goodbye and hangs up.
But I just sit there, staring at nothing, his words echoing around my head.
I’m pregnant.
Six weeks pregnant.
And it’s Cole’s baby.
Chapter Six
Cole
I stare at the sky above me, watching the clouds moving in the wind as the alcohol flows around my system, numbing everything I feel.
It’s the only way I can cope right now.
Forgetting is the only way I can deal, because acknowledging what happened, what is happening… I just can’t do that.
The image of Hadley tied up inside that burning trailer is imprinted in my mind. If I manage to get any sleep, it’s all I dream of—only in my slumber, I don’t get to her in time. Instead of pulling her out alive, I’m forced to lift her lifeless body and carry her out of there so she can have a proper resting place, not be forced to end her days as a pile of ash.
When I’m awake, the fear in her eyes haunts me. The smell of burning. The acrid taste of destruction.
It’s the only thing I can think about.
It was all my fault. All of it. And no matter what anyone says, I can’t forgive myself for putting the people I care about in that position.
Hadley could have died. Ace could have died. Hell, even James could have died. And all because of me. Because I’m too much of a fuck-up to do something decent with my life.
I lift the bottle to my lips once more and swallow down liquid that I’m long past tasting.
I have no idea what time it is, but the sun is beginning to set behind the d
ark clouds that taunt me.
It was raining an hour or so ago, but I didn’t move. A little rain is the least I deserve.
The others got up and went to school this morning. Even James left the house to go to work. I know they’re giving me space, but at the same time I can’t help thinking that they’re looking straight through me. Almost as if I did die and I’m no longer here.
No one listened to me when I demanded that Hadley stay here so we know she’s safe. No one seemed to care when I didn’t turn up for school this morning.
Everyone just seems to have checked out… or is that me?
I rest my head back and close my eyes, but it doesn't last long. The second I feel myself start to succumb to my exhaustion, that image is there again. It feels so real, like I can actually feel the weight of her in my arms.
