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"Jesus," I mutter, dragging myself up so I'm sitting on the edge of my bed.
I glance over at the cold space next to me. She should be laying there. Friday night should be our night. But it's not. And something tells me that while it's going to be the beginning of things changing for Mia and Cade, it's going to be the final nail in the coffin for the two of us.
We can keep saying things like 'it's going to be fine' or 'we'll find a way out,' but the reality is that we're just two people who are mostly naïve to the workings of Q and have no fucking clue what we're really up against.
Running my fingers through my hair, I tug until it hurts before I make my way to my bathroom to get ready for the day.
I'm the last one down to the kitchen, and every set of eyes turns my way as I step into the room.
"Ah look, it's the miserable fuck who refused to get his dick wet Friday night."
"Fuck off, Ash."
"Not all of us want the STIs that comes with fucking those whores," Channing mutters, standing up for me.
"I didn't hear you saying that while you had one on her knees," Brandon offers, making Channing's face twist in anger.
"Whatever, asshole.”
"Bacon and eggs, Mr. Easton?" Mulligan asks.
I want to say no and escape instead, but my stomach growls loud enough for him to hear and I don't get a chance to argue.
The guys remain silent as he lowers a plate before me and pours me a coffee.
"So Cade, you ready for your last week as a single man?" Ashton asks, briefly glancing at me, ensuring that I'm aware that his question is purely for my benefit.
My grip on the fork in my hand becomes painful as I lift a piece of bacon to my mouth. I force it past my lips and chew, but I barely taste it as a wicked smirk curls at Cade's lips.
"I can't wait. Friday night is going to be fucking banging."
"Someone will be banging alright," Ashton barks out before laughing at his own joke.
Everyone aside from Channing and I join in. He's the only one who has any fucking clue how I feel right now, and I couldn't be more grateful for him trusting me with the truth about him and Sasha, proving that we're on the same team here.
"There are going to be people in and out of the house all week getting things ready, setting the bedroom up, all that shit. But I expect you all here Thursday night. No fucking excuses."
"Why?" I ask, dread already sitting heavy in my stomach.
"Just want to spend some time with my nearest and dearest before the big night. That okay with you, Easton?" He raises a brow as he waits for me to argue about my attendance.
"I need to get to class," I say, shoving my mostly full plate away and standing from the table.
I might have been hungry when I first walked in, but it's safe to say that my appetite has well and truly been ruined now.
"Bex, wait," a familiar voice calls before I get to the front door.
I don't bother looking over my shoulder. I don't want to see the pity on his face or the hurt when I say what I need to say. "I'm not fucking interested, Rexford." Alex gasps at my use of his surname.
I blow through the door, and I'm racing out of the driveway in a heartbeat.
If only I could keep fucking driving and never return.
If only… I laugh to myself. There's no way I could leave Mia here to do all of this alone.
I keep my head down all fucking day. I don't even bother looking up when I know she's walked into class. I know looking at her is going to be painful, and I'm already crumbling without having to see a similar look in her eyes.
She's all set for the ceremony. When we messaged briefly yesterday evening, she told me how she'd chosen the dress the day before and how she's fallen out with her friend Annabel, although she didn't go into detail, saying that it would be easier to explain in person. Of course, I want to know. If it's upsetting her then it's important to me, but I can't help thinking that we've got bigger issues right now than that.
