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“I-I can’t.” My voice cracks as silent tears roll down my cheeks.
“Mia, it’ll be okay,” Sasha says, but I barely hear her over the roar of blood in my ears. She doesn’t know… she doesn’t know that a piece of me died that night here with Cade. That he broke something inside me that I’ll never get back.
I sob harder, lost to the tidal wave of emotion wracking my body. It isn’t until Bexley appears, reaching inside the car for me, that I break free of my trance.
“I’ve got you, Mia,” he says, cradling me against his chest. I want to fight him, to tell him to put me down and leave me be, but being in his arms, breathing in his familiar scent settles something inside me, and I relax against his chest, letting him carry me inside.
Sasha and Channing don’t follow us as he takes me straight to my room. My new room.
The only place I have to call my own, now my home is gone.
Another wave of grief hits me as Bexley lays me down on the bed. Part of me wants him to leave, to let me break in solace. But the other part, the tiny sliver of the Mia I was before I woke up in that hospital bed, is relieved when he kicks off his sneakers and climbs on the bed beside me, pulling me into the hard lines of his body. “Shh, Mia. I’m here. I’m right here.”
“They’re gone,” I whimper, clutching at his t-shirt. “They’re really gone.”
“I know, little mou—Mia.” He lets out a resigned sigh. “I know.”
Bexley cups my face, letting his thumbs wipe away the tears streaking down my cheeks. “But I’m here. I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere. I swear.” He holds me as I lose my fight to the swell of emotion battering my insides. It’s like a storm, unrelenting and unstoppable. A force of nature trying to destroy me from the inside out.
I cry and cry. I cry until my eyes hurt and my lungs burn. I cry until my body slowly shuts down, depleted and weary.
Eventually, the tears subside. But the hole in my heart is bigger than ever.
“I love you, Mia,” Bexley whispers against my forehead, his lips touching the skin there. “I love you so fucking much, and I need you. I need you to fight, baby. I need you to…” He trails off, tucking me closer, holding on as if he’s scared that I might disappear at any second.
And I feel as if I might.
I feel as if I might disintegrate into nothing but a cloud of grief and anger.
But as I begin to drift, I realize I’m not alone.
Bexley is here.
He’ll ground me.
Even if I can’t see the way out of this black abyss yet, he’ll be at my side, fighting for me.
* * *
When I wake up, I’m alone. I gingerly push up on my elbows, wincing at the lingering pain in my limbs. The doctors said that I was lucky apart from the contusion on my head and a few deep cuts and scrapes.
Lucky.
I don’t feel very lucky.
I feel cursed. Trapped in a dark and twisted game I never asked to be a part of.
I lay there, still and silent, thinking about my life. About my parents, and my childhood. Everything’s tainted now, tarnished by the lies and secrets.
Lies and secrets they paid the ultimate price for.
The room I’m in is unfamiliar, but it’s full of my possessions from my dorm room. My makeup litters the dresser, and my hoodie is slung over the back of the chair. My small collection of books lines the bookshelf, and someone has hung my daisy chain lights on the wall, framing the mirror.
But it does little to ease the knot in my stomach.
The clock reads four-thirty, which means I’ve been sleeping for hours. The doctor warned me to expect to feel drowsy for a while. Something about the effects of all the medication and my injuries.
I’m to rest and give my body time to completely heal. As if time is a magical cure for a broken heart and fractured soul. A garbled sob crawls up my throat.
