AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He says it in an endlessly patient voice, the kind of voice an older brother would use when his younger sister complains about people being mean to her.
I choke up, embarrassed that Bram is seeing me like this. “They made it sound as if...if I was some kind of a strumpet. They could see that you and I have feelings for each other and they made me feel so...” I almost sob, “guilty.”
Bram laughs.
My body tenses and I almost stop in my tracks. That was not the reaction I expected but he’s close to roaring with laughter, his head bent back, his teeth shining in the dark and I stare at him. What a hardhearted, merciless thing he is.
“How can you laugh about this? This isn’t funny.”
“To me it is. You amuse me with your relentless care about other people and their opinions.” His lips press against my temple. “They don’t matter. Only you matter. Do you hear me? Only you.”
“Bram...” I squirm and we’re close to the house now. The help must have already gone to bed because the whole house is dark. “You don’t understand...”
“Not sure if I want to.”
He sounds like this conversation bores him and like he’s interested in other things. Things like me for instance. When I don’t respond he sighs and strokes my neck.
“You seem tense. How about we play a game? It will get you to relax.”
I shake my head. “I’m not five years old. You can’t distract me with games.” I graze my lips with my teeth. “I need to know something.”
He doesn’t ask me what because I know he can sense what it is. My knees feel weak and I’m petrified of his answer. It would make my world crumble like a house of cards, put me in a position that I won’t know how to get out of.
“Did you...”, this is hard and please say no, say no,“did you hurt Morton?”
I stare at him in apprehension but his lips aren’t moving. He doesn’t give me an answer. Only watches me with eyes the color of black roses. Lowering my lids I notice his fists clenching in his pockets and it causes distress to thump in my head and I lift my dress, turning from him and then I run and he curses behind me.
“Dove, don’t make me chase you,” he growls. “If only you knew how much I have missed you, you wouldn’t run.”
What? Missed me? What is he talking about? I race up the porch, into the house and then I hurry into my bedroom, going so fast that I stumble on the carpet a couple of times. Closing my heavy door, I lock it and finally breathe out with my back against it.
He didn’t deny my question. Didn’t look at me with shock and disgust that I had even dared to ask him that. I would have even welcomed a slap to my face or roaring. Anything other than his silence. His confirming silence.
My body feels like its tearing at the thought of his elegant fingers that touched me like I was a gift meant for nobody but him, also have murdered in cold blood. A chilly breeze seeps into the room from the half open window and flying across the floor I slam it shut and lock it.
Panting loudly I take a peek at the garden but Bram is not there which means he’s probably in the house. But where? Maybe he has withdrawn to his chambers, deciding to give me some space but a part of me doubts it.
I wait with my heart in my throat but when I don’t hear his steps, I figure that he’s going to leave me alone for now. Still trembling, I take off my dress and put on my nightgown and go sit by my vanity.
I need to find a way to calm down, otherwise I’ll never be able to figure how to deal with Bram and I take a couple of long, deep and calming breaths just enough to get my heartrate to slow...
My back shoots straight like an arrow when I in the mirror see the doorknob silently move and I hold my breath, turning around. It moves once more, confirming that I didn’t imagine. Bram must be standing outside.
“Open the door,” he rasps, his tone so convincing and tempting that I almost do as he says.
Licking my lips I reply, “I’m not opening.”
Expecting at least a fist pound or a growl, it takes me by surprise when it doesn’t come. He doesn’t protest, doesn’t make a scene and I don’t know what to do with this. Bram is not the kind to back down. Shivering I turn to the mirror again, telling myself that I can handle this.
Using a q tip to wipe off my smudged mascara to look like I’m more in control, I let out a hoarse shriek when I notice the figure outside my window. How did he get there so fast?
He slightly bends his head because he’s that tall and his hands go to the closed window that can’t open from the outside.
“Dove, don’t shut me out,” he says and my eyes flare. “Let me be with you.”
Shaking my head, I lift my chin, replying in a firm voice, “No.”
Bram looks like he’s about to back down, like he’s done trying to fight with me on this but then he takes off his shirt, only leaving his black suit jacket on and I watch him with apprehensive eyes when he firmly wraps the shirt around his fist.
