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“You are a big boy,” I say to Matthew. Then I set the tray aside, reach for the pills and toss them back. I wish I’d saved something to drink. They stick in my throat.
Scooping Matthew into my arms, I groan, pretending to heave and pant like it’s too much, and it is. “See,” I tell him. “You’re getting bigger every day. I can hardly even lift you anymore.”
He squirms, managing to break free of my grip. I can’t help but smile as he darts off, yelling over his shoulder that he has something he wants to show me. “Enjoy it,” Sean says, motioning toward the tray. “Nothing good lasts.”
Later in the afternoon, Matthew and I head to the park. It’s crisp and cool out, my favorite kind of day. There’s a friskiness to it; there’s something unquantifiable in the air, something you can’t quite put your finger on but know is there.
Matthew runs ahead, and I let him. When we reach the park, Melanie is there on a bench, waiting. “Go on,” I say to Matthew, who has stopped and is waiting for me to catch up. I watch as he bolts toward the slide.
“I know it’s late,” she says as I approach. “But I hope you’ll forgive me.” She stands and hands me the truck I asked her to get for Matthew. “It’s just…Adam is so uptight these days, and Sean reports everything, and well, I guess you can’t really know who you can trust.”
“No,” I reply. “I guess you can’t.”
She sits on the bench in her designer dress, and I think back to the first time I saw her. She looks so out of place. She’s always looked a bit that way. Most members of New Hope weren’t born into wealth the way Melanie was, and maybe that’s what makes her different. She’s hungry in the way so many of us were in the beginning, the way some of us still are, but her hunger never seems quite satiated.
“I know you’re upset, V,” she murmurs, motioning for me to join her on the bench.
I take a seat next to her, leaving enough space so that I can see her face without having to turn completely. “Why would I be upset?”
She follows my gaze toward Matthew, who has now moved onto the swings. He’s going to want a push.
“I know you seduced Marcia Louis.”
My eyes meet hers.
“I saw what happened. Everything. I set up a camera of my own…”
“What for?”
“Don’t worry,” she assures me. “I didn’t tell Adam.”
Matthew calls for me.
When I start to rise from the bench, Melanie reaches over and places her hand on my wrist, causing me to halt. “I need to know I can trust you.”
“You just said you couldn’t trust anyone.”
“But come on. This is me you’re talking to.”
“I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“Have you heard about Abigail Johnson?”
"Who?”
“You know the Johnsons—Steven and Abigail…”
“Yeah,” I reply, even though I have no idea who she’s talking about
“Well, she died last week. They're saying it might have been the new vitamins.”
I cock my head. “Really?” People die for lots of reasons in this community. It could be anything.
“Yes, really,” she answers breezily. She scans the park and lowers her voice. “We have to be careful as women. We have to stick together.”
“They changed the vitamins up…while I was at the center.”
“Stop calling them vitamins, V. We all know what they really are.”
