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“Well, that’s good, I think,” she replied, holding the door open for him. “Did you go to Vic’s?”
“Yeah, to my old bedroom. My dad told me some stories about my mother that made me sad. I wish she’d known you.”
“Katrina and I just said the same thing. It’s so sad.”
His face contorted, and she grabbed him, holding him in her arms.
“For someone to kill herself, I don’t know,” he said.
“She was at the end of herself, Justin. It didn’t have anything to do with you and Dave. You know that, right?”
“She wasn’t thinking of anyone else, that’s for sure.”
“She probably wasn’t able to at that point, Justin. What had happened to her took over her life, and she couldn’t bear the pain. Imagine if someone forced you to give Tina up for adoption. You’d never recover from that grief.”
“It’s unimaginable.”
“If you continue to develop your relationship with your half brother, it will get you through this. Chris is half made of your mother, Justin. You believe in the afterlife. Emily will know you’re with her son, and that will make her happy. Knowing that what you’re doing is going to help her might help you.”
She wasn’t sure she believed that any longer, but Justin had a deep faith. Hopefully, it would see him through this painful time.
“Sit down, and I’ll get you a cup of tea. I can smell the beer from six feet away.”
“Yeah, I kind of blew it tonight.”
“Justin, I’m not your jailer, okay? We decided to stop drinking so much together, but we’re not bonded to it. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
“Yeah, I get it. It’s good that we’re trying to cut back, though. For the baby’s sake.”
“You mean in case she thinks her parents are lushes?” Maggie asked, wondering where this was coming from. “We have some time before that will happen.”
“She’s already grabbing at my beer bottle.”
“It’s fine. It’s because it’s something different, and you have it, and she wants whatever you have. Start pouring it in a glass. I have those vintage metal glasses so she won’t be able to see what you’re drinking.”
“So now we’re hiding it from her.”
“Justin, go to AA, for God’s sake, if you’re so worried.”
“Maggie, after what I’ve learned today, I think I could be just as crazy as my mother. I’m scared.”
Wondering if she should humor Justin or spend the energy trying to get him to face reality, she decided she was too tired to be his cheerleader. “If you’re really scared, you need to see a therapist.”
“What about Annie?”
“Annie would be great,” she said. “And it would be free since we’re financing her master’s.”
“Well, you are,” Justin said. “Sure, I’ll talk to Annie about my mother. Since I’m a big boy now, I can make my own appointment.”
“You can make your own appointment,” Maggie agreed. “By the way, Amber called.”
Justin shook his head. “I was so close.”
“Ha! It’s all good. She sort of apologized, and I sort of did, too. You don’t have to be embarrassed that I overreacted.”
“Maggie, I’m not embarrassed.”
“Well, actually, you said I embarrassed you. Can we stop talking about it? Because I’m getting pissed off again. I just wanted to inform you she called. But you have to decide if she’s important to you, Justin, because I’m over it. I don’t want Amber in my life.”
