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My eyes widened as tears filled them. “Momma!”
Painful as it was, I rushed over and knelt on the ground, my side screaming at me the whole way down. As my eyes focused, my brain fully processed what I saw.
My mother, who wasn’t supposed to be there, lying under the lifeless body of my father. The man she’d left. The man she’d abandoned. The man who I could only assume had given his life to protect hers, but still failed anyway.
What the fuck happened here?
His white button-up shirt was stained red in three places. Three spots… three shots. He’d been killed with a gun. The same as Miss Sunbury had, only he’d been shot in the back. My mother, however, suffered the same fate as the poor special ed teacher.
A single shot directly to the forehead.
Another wail bubbled in my chest, and my entire torso tightened as I prepared to release it. I bit my lip hard enough that I tasted blood to stop it. The pain was too intense, and I could feel the world fading away. I knew that any moment, strong men and women would rush inside to drag me out, and I’d never get the chance to say goodbye.
My eyes were filled with so many tears, I could hardly see. I put my hands on the floor and slowly moved my feet out from under me as I scooted closer. Laying on my left side, I stroked my mother’s hair for what I knew would be the last time.
“I know you weren’t always there for me,” I choked out. “You were a terrible mother.” I inhaled sharply, and the pain almost took me. I had to hurry. “But I know you loved me. You loved me in the only way you knew how, and I loved you, too.”
Pulling myself closer with my left arm, I kissed her cheek. It was still warm. I could smell her shampoo and her perfume. I committed that scent to memory as I laid my head on her breast, my forehead against my father’s.
“Daddy.” My eyes squeezed shut as tears poured. This one hurt the worst. My right hand cupped the side of his face. “I love you. Thank you for raising me the best you could. I’m strong because of you. I’m smart because of you. I know what a good man is because of you.”
My thumb stroked his face as I tilted my head enough to kiss his forehead. Like my mother, I inhaled deep the scent of his hair. My eyes closed again, and this time I didn’t fight it. I willed away the thoughts of reality. I forced away anything having to do with that day.
I pretended it was one of my sick days from school. One where I was too sick and in too much pain to want to be alone, so I asked my dad to stay home with me. I imagined him sitting on the couch with me laying on it, my head in his lap as his fingers combed through my hair the way mine combed through his right now. As sick as I’d felt, he’d made me feel safe.
Every time I hugged him when I was sad or when I cried on his shoulder, he’d made me feel safe. I continued to inhale through my stuffy nose, smelling his familiar scent and letting the last bit of comfort I’d ever take from that wash over me as my consciousness faded.
I knew when I finally went under, I’d never again smell them. I’d never again look at their faces. My mother’s death broke my heart, but my father… His was a devastation I couldn’t yet begin to process.
“I love you, Daddy,” I whispered as my body went limp.
“Temperance? Temperance!”
My mind registered the voice, but it wasn’t enough to pull me back. As I lost consciousness, I knew that whether my body lived or died, my life as I knew it was over, and the old me was certainly dead.
Nothing would ever be the same.
CHAPTER TWO
Igroaned as consciousness took hold. My entire right side felt like it had gone through a woodchipper. My bed was harder than usual, and I didn’t remember my sheets being quite so scratchy, not that they were unbearable. Before I even opened my eyes, I tried to shift, and that proved to be a big mistake.
“MMMfuck!” I cried out as my eyes opened. My hands shot to my right side, and I tried to breathe through the pain. When I finally got it under control, I took in the room around me, a stab of fear shooting through me like a bolt of lightning. It was then that I noticed the consistent beeping next to me and noticed the sterile scent. This wasnotmy bed or my bedroom. “What the hell?”
Slowly, things started coming back to me. This was a hospital. I’d been injured in the church.
The fire.
The bodies everywhere…
Oh, God…
My parents.
My head fell back against my pillow as my eyes closed tight, spilling tears onto my cheeks. Now that I remembered what had happened, images of lying next to their dead bodies took over my brain. They were gone. My parents were dead, and I’d never talk to them ever again.
I wanted to scream, but I knew it would hurt like hell, so I stayed quiet as more tears formed. I just wanted to go back to sleep. I was so tired, but my brain was on alert now, and there was no chance of that. Not until I was able to calm back down.
Forcing the horrible images away, I checked out my surroundings. I was hooked up to an IV and a lot of wires. Outside the bedroom window next to the door, a cop stood there talking to someone, but I couldn’t see if it was another cop or someone who worked at the hospital.
