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My heart fell to the floor. Asher was mad—furious even—and I could see what appeared to be hurt there as well. I’d hurt him.
I tried to remind myself that he ruined any chances with me that very morning when I saw him tormenting an innocent guy and when I found out he and the rest of those assholes treated women like cattle. Had them on standby. It was disgusting.
Yet…
Damian was objectively the worst of them all, and I’d done some questionable things with him in the bathroom. So, I suppose my moral compass wasn’t exactly all that high and mighty right then, now was it?
“It’s not like Iplannedit,” I snapped. “He followed me into the bathroom! When a teacher came in there, he pushed me into the fucking stall, covered my mouth, and held me against the wall.”
His nostrils flared, and the muscles in his jaws tightened as his hands balled into fists. “Did he force himself on you?”
“Whoa, no.No.” I sighed and rubbed the bridge of my nose. “Jesus hell, this is complicated.”
“Then take a breath and explain it because I’m trying to protect you, and you’re going out of your fucking way to get into trouble. I knowhisside of things, but I want yours.”
Taking his advice, I took a deep breath and tried to calm my nerves. “Okay. I have some… issues,” I started.
He snorted. “Yeah. I’d fucking say you do.” I looked at him with obvious anger, and he swallowed hard. “Sorry. Please continue. What kind of issues?”
I struggled with what I could and couldn’t say. Obviously, I couldn’t tell him what happened back in Indiana because of the whole story. If he or anyone else pieced it together, it could put me in danger. Hell, it could put Rick, Harper, Angela, and anyone else who knew in danger.
At the same time, I knew I had to get my point across, so maybe he could understand.
“I’ve gone through… some things. Some things that I think gave me PTSD.”
“Oh, shit. Are you okay?” he asked, his voice immediately sympathetic.
I risked looking into his eyes, and I still saw the rage there, but I saw pity as well. I waved a hand.
“Look, I can’t trust you. I shouldn’t have even told you that much. Damian is fucking with me, and I don’t trust you not to go run back to him and tell him everything I say.”
He laughed, but it was unamused. “Me? You don’t trustme? I’m the one motherfucker here trying to keep yououtof trouble. I warned you earlier to stay out of his way. What did you do? Go off and damn near fuck him in the bathroom.”
My eyes widened. “Excuse me?No. No, I did not. He didn’t even kiss me. Well…” I paused accidentally when I remembered the small kiss hedidgive me and where exactly that kiss was, but I shook my head. He didn’t need to know that.
“Oh, I already know all about thekisshe gave you,” he said, angrily crossing his arms over his chest. His muscular biceps pulled the material tight, and swallowed hard.
Holy hell, I was a mess.
“This talk isn’t going so well,” I said.
He shook his head. “No, it isn’t.”
I sighed, looking down at the floor. Suddenly, an idea came to me, and I looked up at him with hope. “I was told there’s a recreational gym here. One where we can work out any time before curfew.”
He nodded. “Yeah. There is. It has pretty much anything you could possibly need in it. Why?”
I poked his arm. “Well, clearly, you work out. I do, too. Especially when I need to blow off stress. I haven’t been able to do much since the…” I stopped myself, my eyes going wide as I sucked in a breath. Even in such an uncomfortable situation, Asher was incredibly easy to talk to, and I almost blurted out about the attack.
“Since the what?” he asked.
Think, think, think.
“Uh, since the accident. The, uh, car accident.”
His face softened, and soon his entire body did as well. “Is that… what caused the PTSD?”
At that moment, I was mixed with instant regret for having lied to him, but I was also beyond excited that I’d created the perfect excuse.
