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Hannah smiles, and it’s so bright it puts the sun to shame. She reaches up to touch my face, smoothing her fingers over my cheeks like she wants to wipe my tears away. She can’t do that, not even in the dream, but the thought is enough.
“Love you,” I murmur, looking into her eyes.
“Love you back,” she says. “Always.”
The dream fades, and I wake up in my bed between Ash and Gage. Ash is awake, watching me curiously as I blink and shake the haze of sleep off.
“Good morning,” he murmurs, his voice a little raspy. He leans in and kisses me, and I lean into it gladly, kissing him back and taking comfort in it.
“Bad dreams?” he asks, pulling back and searching my face.
I shake my head against the pillow, brow furrowed as I try to think of how to describe it.
“It wasn’t bad,” I say. “I was with my sister, but we were just... talking. It just hurt because…”
Ash nods, reaching up to brush hair out of my face. “Because it wasn’t real?” he offers.
I nod in return. “Yeah. Because I can only talk to her in my dreams now, and that’s not really... real. That’s not how I’d want to talk to her. But it’s a better dream than so many I’ve had, you know? I didn’t have to watch her die time and time again, and Julian wasn’t there. I’ve been having better dreams lately, where we just talk and hang out in our tree.”
“What do you talk about?” Ash wants to know. I can’t tell if he’s asking because he actually cares about the answer or because he thinks it’s good for me to talk about it, but either way, I tell him.
I smile a little, one half of it pressed into the pillow. “Well, we talked about you guys a little.”
“Oh, really?” he asks, arching an eyebrow. He doesn’t have his glasses on in bed, but we’re close enough that it doesn’t affect how he sees me, I guess. He looks younger without them, more playful. “Did you tell her how amazing we are? How we rock your world every night and then tuck you into bed like gentlemen?”
“Yeah, Ash,” I say, rolling my eyes. “I told my sister all about the sex we have. For sure.”
He laughs softly, still stroking fingers through my hair. “Knew it. What did you actually tell her?”
“I told her—” I remember telling Hannah that I loved all these men in my dream. I remember how easy it was to say it there, knowing the only person who could hear me was my sister who would never tell anyone because she can’t.
Somehow the thought of saying it out loud in the light of day is still terrifying. I’m not sure what I think is going to happen, but my heart races just thinking about it. The words won’t come out, so I take a deep breath and pivot a little.
“I told her I’d try to be happy.”
Ash narrows his eyes. He’s so fucking perceptive, especially when it comes to people not telling the whole truth. Then he grins, leaning in closer to me. “You look like you have a secret.”
“No, I don’t. You’re just seeing things. Probably because you’re not wearing your glasses.”
Ash rolls over on top of me, pushing me onto my back so he can settle between my legs. He leans down and kisses me, starting with my forehead. Then he drops one on my nose, making me scrunch my face up. But he smooths it back out again by kissing me on the mouth, soft and slow.
I arch up into it, kissing him back. It’s a good way to wake up first thing in the morning.
Gage wakes up beside us, yawning and squinting.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Ash, can you be any louder? I think there are some people down the goddamn street who might still be asleep.”
He’s grumpy and gruff, but I know he doesn’t really mind that much. That fact is just emphasized when he rolls over and presses his lips to my bare shoulder, kissing his way up to my neck.
A happy little sigh spills from my lips, and I don’t even bother to try to hold it back. I love waking up like this.
Ash is morning hard against me, and I know if I scooted a little to my right I’d be able to feel that Gage is probably hard too. But before I can even contemplate doing that, the door opens and Knox comes walking in.
“Motherfucker,” Ash groans, lifting his head and looking at Knox. “Really? You just come bursting in here first thing in the morning? We’re busy.”
“Oh, fuck off,” Knox replies, rolling his eyes. “You’re the biggest fucking cockblock in this house. You’re always interrupting shit and you don’t care. Don’t crawl up my ass when I do the same shit.”
An offended look crosses Ash’s face. “I interrupt when I have to,” he points out. “Not just for the fun of it.”
