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**
It’s been four days since Jeremy picked Rose and I up at the Aria after our fight, and she had yet to call me. Her stubborn streak was good. Better than mine, that’s for sure. I hated not talking to her. But with the silence, I had nothing but time to think. Think about if I could really have the confidence do what she suggested. If I could really live with my mother and Stu (Hmm. Confidence booster right there). Too often I found myself thinking about Mr. Nuts. Each time I looked at the Vaughn Haley Instagram, I noticed him. Nathaniel was only in the background of all the pictures. He never joined the party, leaving me to wonder why.
At nine-thirty that night I drove to The Cave to finally talk to Rose. Thursday’s are usually her slow nights so we should have some time. I snuck in and her back was to the door. She didn’t see me. The place was packed. Rose told me things usually pick up during the summer months, but damn this was crazy.
“Hey, baby, can I have an Angel’s Tit?” I asked in my best manly voice.
“Sorry, we don’t serve perverts here,” she retorted as she turned around and chuckled.
“Ouch. That one hurt,” I pretended like I was shot in the chest. “But you gotta admit that’s a pretty good one!”
“You have to stop Googling dirty drinks. What’s up? I’m working and we’re a little busy. Some country festival bullshit,” she yelled over a group of rowdy cowboys.
“I was hoping we could get a chance to talk about things,” I told her.
“Well can we do that at home, please?” Rose asked.
“I can’t apply for a summer job from home,” I smiled.
“Good thing I have an in with the management. Let’s go talk to Vanessa.” Rose grabbed me by the wrist and drug me into Vanessa’s office.
***
Rose and the girls took me shopping the next morning for everything I needed. Apparently, the club doesn’t provide your outfits. And now that I thought about it, that’s probably a good thing. Ewww, gross. I would not want to share things with some of the other girls. There is a plethora of costume, lingerie, and sex shops in Las Vegas to help me create the exact persona I wanted to become each night. Outfits were needed for floor and lap dances, the stage performances, catering to the fantasies of certain clients, and for the different theme nights when the club put on a party and the girls dressed similar. And I needed at least three outfits for each night, according to Jade. Well, there goes my emergency credit card. But I guess somewhere in this crazy world, stripper heels are considered an emergency.
At lunch, Vanessa and Ashlynn gave me the run-down of how a typical night at the club worked. I had no idea that you actually had to pay the club to be able to dance there. It’s like their cut. “The harder you hustle, the more dollars in your G-string,” Ashlynn said to me. Made sense. “Just a few simple rules to live by. One: Only participate in what makes you comfortable. Don’t let anyone make you do something you don’t feel comfortable with. Two: Don’t date the clients. It always turns out messy,” she chuckled. “Okay. I didn’t mean for it to sound like that. And three: The most important rule, have fun. Loosen up with a few drinks if you need to, but don’t get drunk. Sloppy strippers are no bueno. I watched a girl walk right off stage once.” Ashlynn had a sense of humor that could make anyone laugh.
“Seems easy enough,” I replied with a nervous smile. The rest of our lunch went by smoothly. We talked about the policies and the rules at The Cave. The differences between pole, floor and stage dances and how with each you created a different character. Each of the girls at the club had a signature dance. I was going to need to figure out mine and soon. “So when will they teach me the dances?” I questioned.
“Oh girl, no one teaches you,” Bree informed me with her cute southern drawl. “Nope. You're on your own to figure out your moves.”
Vanessa must have sensed my nervousness, and sought to put me at ease. “Ready for your make-over?" she asked.
I shrugged my shoulders. “I guess.”
“Ladies, we'll see you later. I'll bring Ry with me tonight and then I think I we need an emergency girl’s night after work. I’ll text you all the details.” Vanessa grabbed me by the wrist and yanked me out of the restaurant.
The drive to Vanessa’s place was quiet. The thought of whether or not I had the confidence do this kept running through my mind. I was honestly scared to death. What no one knew, not even Rose, was that I could dance. And I was pretty damn good too. After Lucas left me, I needed to find something to make me feel like a woman again, something to make me feel sexy. I found a pole fitness Groupon and figured why the hell not. I became addicted. So instead of the gym, I took classes twice a week. In private or in Jewel’s dance studio I was a sexy beast, but this had yet to be tested in front of others. It was my dirty little secret.
Vanessa had a small place on the outskirts of Las Vegas. Perfect for her and her cat, Hairball. The extra room was set up as a complete dressing room. I was undeniably jealous.
“So we have a good five hours until we have to leave for work. Let’s figure you out,” Vanessa said as she started pouring us a glass of wine. Vanessa was the entertainment manager for the club. She was more like a den mother to the girls at The Cave than a boss. She was in charge of helping the girls get settled in and to find their way, so to speak.
We walked back and sat in front of the vanity mirror in the dressing room. “I’m scared, Nes. I’m older than most of the girls at the club. What if I get rejected because they think I'm too old? What if I fall flat on my face? What if someone recognizes me?” I rambled on.
“Rose was right. You do worry too much,” she answered as she got up and stood behind me. “One thing at a time. First, I’m eight years older than you, girl. I don’t get rejected. It’s all in your attitude. You have a smoking hot body. Get up. Go stand in front of the mirror.
“What?” I questioned. “Why?”
“Do it,” she demanded. Even though Vanessa is only five foot three and I stood a good five inches over her, I wouldn’t dare argue with her. “Strip. Take it all off, Ryann.” I took off my clothes and stood there looking at myself in the mirror. I felt exposed and tried to cover myself up. Vanessa pulled my hands down. I've always kept myself in good shape, but I’ve been less confident in myself as a woman since the divorce, even with the classes. The feeling that I was somehow broken, not good enough has been slowing dragging me down as my situation got worse and worse. “If you can’t feel comfortable being naked in front of me, how can you do it in front of hundreds of men and women?” she asked softly.
“Women?” I shyly repeated.
“Yes, honey. It’s Vegas. They all show up. Do you know what I see in front of me?” I shook my head. “A striking woman who will soon gain back her confidence this summer. You're tall, with amazingly strong legs. You have these cute perky tits, just like mine,” she laughed as she grabbed her own boobs and jiggled them around. “Not saggy from those pesky kids sucking on them for years. And obviously you do some squats, because this ass is like two perfectly shaped globes. You want to look different, I can make that happen and I understand your reasons, Teach. But embrace this body you have. Not all of us are as blessed as you.” I put on one of the silk robes that she handed me.
“Do you really think I can do this, Vanessa?” I searched her face for the reassurance I needed.
“This might sound weird, but hear me out. You teach kindergarten, right? So what’s your day really about? Putting on a show to keep the attention of a group five-year-olds. Essentially, throughout the day you become many different characters to teach them what they need to know. The purpose at a strip club quite similar. Most of our customers are overgrown drunk boys anyways. Become the character, but rather than teach them, take their money. The best advice I can give you is listen to your customer. They are paying you. Create their fantasy.” She finished her speech and I started to feel a little more confident in the situation.
“Alright. Let’s make me over,” I said to her with a cautious grin.
