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“How were you supposed to know?”
Rachel sighs and uses the sleeve of her coat to wipe the mascara smudging under her eye. “I thought it was kinda weird Mom came to visit out of the blue before. It seemed like she and Dad were going through something. But then,” Rachel pauses and inhales deeply to calm the shaking in her voice, “they invited everyone over for Christmas so I just assumed they solved whatever issues they were having.”
“Well, don’t feel like you have to be strong for them. It’s not your fault your mom decided to cheat on your dad. If anything, I think they’re being really selfish.”
She nods, but I can tell my words aren’t having any effect on her. “I know,” she murmurs while striding past me toward the McDonalds. I sigh as I watch her go. It’s terrible her parents decided to do this, especially during the holidays, but somehow I feel like it’s foreshadowing of what will come of my relationship with Rachel.
I would never cheat on her. Ever. I love her too much to ever hurt her in anyway. Often times, I still feel guilty for the way I treated her when my mother was dying; refusing to speak with Rachel, being out at all hours of the night, getting so fucked up so I don’t have to think anymore. I would never put Rachel though anything like that, ever again.
But I’m graduating this year. I will be leaving for Chicago in July to begin training. Not to mention I will have to go apartment hunting in June. I’ll never cheat on Rachel, but things don’t look good for us. I’ll be traveling all around the world, spending at most three days in each area. It won’t be the same. Things will never be the same again, and part of me doesn’t want to put Rachel through the hassle. I don’t want to hurt her again.
Should we end things in May?
Or try to do long distance, despite the likelihood of it not working out?
I keep my thoughts to myself as Rachel walks toward me, coffee in hand with a fake smile on her lips. She’s back to acting strong, and I won’t question her on it. I smile at her as she takes my hand and leads me back to the group.
“We checked your bag,” Sarah says sweetly.
Tom frowns at my hand in Rachel’s before glancing at Lucas.
“Thanks, Mom.” Rachel sighs as she looks around the group. “I guess I should finish this coffee before heading to security.”
“Take your time,” says Tom, still frowning at me. “You still have over an hour."
“Are you excited for the new semester?” Sarah asks while stroking Rachel’s hair away from her face. “Any fun classes you’re taking?”
Rachel nods. “Yeah, another drawing and photography class. This time I will be with Charlie.”
“Oh, that’s nice.” Sarah nods and glances at Tom, who still hasn’t stopped staring at me. “Tom, doesn’t that sound nice?”
“Very.”
“Are you okay?” I hear Seth say.
I glance in his direction and watch as he strokes Rachel’s cheek. She smiles sadly at him and gives him a curt nod. “Talk about it later?” she whispers.
Seth nods. “Of course.”
“I thought Rachel was dating Lucas,” I hear Tom mutter.
I still, my whole body growing tense. Eyes flash in my general direction. I can see Seth’s mouth falling open in shock while Alex’s face flushes. Lucas moves toward Rachel, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and giving an awkward chuckle.
“They are dating, Tom,” says Sarah, her voice high pitched. “They’re just all close, you know. Kids these days.” Sarah chuckles awkwardly while patting her husband’s shoulder. “Besides, aren’t you happy Rachey found some nice men to look after her while she’s in Colorado?”
“Sure,” Tom murmurs, his gaze growing suspicious as he looks between us.
I can’t believe I completely forgot about the plan. Lucas was supposed to be Rachel’s boyfriend around her dad. It made the most sense given Lucas wasn’t going home to visit his parents. Now I’ve gone and possibly fucked everything up.
I immediately release Rachel’s hand while she turns around and dumps her half-drunk coffee into a trash can nearby. “Well, I guess we should get going,” says Rachel awkwardly. “Security might take a while and I don’t want us to miss our flight.”
“Call me when you get home,” says Tom while shoving himself past Sarah. He pulls her into a warm bear-hug. “Maybe I can try to visit in the spring. Would you be alright with that?”
Rachel nods as she pulls away. “Yeah, Dad, that should be fine. Just let me know.”
Tom chuckles. “Don’t worry. I won’t be like your mom and show up randomly at your door.”
Sarah scowls at Tom’s back as she strides toward Rachel, wrapping her arms around her daughter’s waist. “You behave now, you hear?”
