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I purse my lips and turn around, not knowing if I should answer this question truthfully or tell an obvious lie. “What do you think?”
Alex’s month gapes open, making me giggle like I’m a schoolgirl. “You use our stuff?”
“Well, not quite. I like the one that smells like melon the most.”
“I use melon!”
And I’m chuckling again. God, am I going to start fluttering my eyelashes next? “Oh. Sorry about that?”
Alex groans. “Why do I feel like you’re not sorry at all?”
“That would be a correct assessment.” I grab another beer, this one titledThe Black Hole.What is up with these names and why am I so attracted to them? “You’re paying for these, right?” I ask while handing the can to Alex. “I have no money.”
I watch Alex shake his head through the reflection in the glass and bite my lip to keep from smiling. “You are ridiculous,” he mutters. I notice he hasn’t answered my question and so, naturally, I assume I can pick out more beer for him to buy. I have no idea what Lucas prefers, nor do I care. I’m mostly choosing for myself now and I grab two more cans, readingUnicorn FartsandTeddy Bear Kisses,which remind me of Rachel. She looked upset when we left. Maybe these brightly colored cans with cute unicorns and bears will make her feel better.
“Do you think we should get red wine, or white wine for the turkey?”
I perk up, finding Alex standing in an aisle behind me, holding the bottles up.
“I suppose red wine will taste better,” he mutters. “But I do prefer a good chardonnay.”
“Neither,” I say while stalking toward him, about to wrench those bottles from his hands and shove them back on the shelf. “This isn’t one of your fancy twelve-course dinners.” I move to swipe the bottles from his hands, only realizing now, like an idiot, that I’m carrying two cans in my hands. There’s no way I can grab the bottles from him. Not without making a mess, anyway.
Alex chuckles and shakes his head. “I wonder who actually can eat their way through a twelve-course dinner. I would really like to see that.”
“What?” I ask with a sly smile and a coy tilt of my head. “You don’t?”
Alex gestures to himself. He’s still holding the bottles in his hands, which makes the movement awkward. I can’t help smiling at his exasperated look, nor can I stop my eyes from traveling down the length of him. His long coat and thick sweater leave much to the imagination, but I’ve seen him on runs and I’ve seen him after practice, when he’s drenched in sweat, when his skin is glistening in the sun.
Fuck, what is wrong with me?I clamp my eyes closed and shake my head. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right,” I murmur while turning around and stepping away from him. The moment my eyes open, I am greeted by a small red basket lying on the ground. I place my cans of beers inside, thankful to have something to do to take my thoughts away from Alex.
“Well, we better not forget these,” I hear Alex and once again he’s next to me, his breath on my cheek, his hand grazing mine as he placesBlack HoleandBlack DeathbesideUnicorn FartsandTeddy Bear Kissesin it. A shiver ripples through me and pools into the flames beginning low in my belly. My hands fist, trying to calm myself. If only he knew what his touch did to me. For a moment, I allow those hopeful thoughts to fill me, wondering if he truly is flirting with me. First with the sniffing and now with the faint touch. Could he possibly be interested?
No, Seth,I tell myself while Alex draws away from me. He returns for the white and red bottles of wine. I watch him shrug and place both of them in the basket. I feel that urge to tell him, to spill everything and finally let all my pent-up emotions go. I’ve already spoken with Rachel. She’s practically given me her blessing. And Dr. Forrester did always say it’s better to voice my thoughts and emotions rather than keep them contained inside me.
Alex grabs the basket and I follow him toward the cash register. I pick at my fingernails while I watch him pay, unable to take my gaze off his broad shoulders. What will come of me telling him this? He’ll most likely tell me he doesn’t think of me in that way, or he’s going to be grossed out. Either way, I will be totally fucked. He will treat me differently. We won’t be bros anymore. Since when have I grown so attached to him? I feel like it was just yesterday we were arguing nonstop. I hated the bastard. Like genuinely hated him. Now, I can’t stop thinking about his lips and how they would feel if I brushed mine against them.
“All right, let’s go,” Alex says while lugging the large paper bag filled with our booze. “Now that you spent all my money.”
I force a chuckle at that and turn on my heel, stalking toward the door. I’m not going to do it, I decide. I will go to my grave with this secret. That’s that way it’s going to have to be. How will voicing my affections help at all? It will only create a huge mess I will be forced to clean up, and I hate cleaning up messes. Nope. Not telling him. End of story.
“Fuck, Seth!”
“Huh?” I spin around, worried when I hear the desperate tone in his voice. My eyes widen as I see Alex tilting toward me. His eyes are wide, filled with alarm. His hand clenches around the bag, but I’m hardly aware of that as I see his mouth getting closer to mine.
Oh.It’s the only silly word that comes to mind as my eyes flutter closed and I tilt my head back, my lips puckering. Is this really happening? And why? Has he decided enough is enough? Is that what’s going on? Or is this a dream and I’m still dreaming? His lips ever so softly brush against mine and it’s the most electric tingle I’ve felt since kissing Rachel. My body trembles and I lean closer, pressing my lips fully on his, wanting to deepen it, but not wanting to push. We are out in public and everything. It’s the most perfect first kiss I could ask from a guy I once hated, and I really hope this won’t be the last of our kisses.
My eyes flutter open as I pull away. I feel like I’m in an anime. Alex’s face is surrounded by dreamlike bubbles I’m sure my romantic heart has conjured up. His eyes are still wide, alarmed. His face is pinched together as if he hadn’t meant to do what he did.
Wait.
Hold up.
Was this a mistake?I blink and take a step back, looking around and noticing no one is watching us. Everyone seems so busy with their own lives.
“What was that?” Alex asks, his voice tinged with something I can’t quite put a finger on.
“Huh?” is the only thing I can say at this point.
