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Watching Paige walk out the door was worse than I could have ever imagined. The words that were about to come out of my mouth, I meant them with everything in me. But she didn't want to hear it, and who can blame her? I'm a fucking mess who doesn't deserve to breathe the same air as her. I had the best thing in the world in the palm of my hands, and I lost it. I lost her. She's gone.
I pick up my nightstand, and in one fluid move, I throw it with full force into the window. The whole thing shatters as the nightstand flies right through it. I flip my bed and swipe everything off my desk, watching as it all scatters on the floor.
Just as I throw one of my football trophies into the mirror and see it shatter, I'm yanked backward, and my whole body is slammed into the wall. Carter pins me, staring me down with both fear and anger in his eyes.
"Get the fuck off me!" I roar.
I try to move but he shoves me harder. "Not until you calm down!"
He might have had a chance at holding me in place in normal circumstances, but the adrenaline coursing through my body gives me an extra edge. I put both hands on his shoulders and push as hard as I can. Carter stumbles backwards, falling on the ground and cutting his leg on a broken piece of the chair.
As he looks down at the blood oozing from the cut, his expression darkens. Before I know it, he's charging full force at me. I feel as the sheetrock breaks against my back and the two of us go right through the wall and fall onto the floor in the hallway.
Carter lands on top of me, but the punch to the face that I was expecting never comes. Instead, he uses all his strength to hold me down.
"Are you fucking done, you goddamn psychopath?" he sneers.
"Screw you."
He smirks in a way that irritates the shit out of me. "Thanks for the offer, but I like my women a little less scrappy."
I try to buck him off, but he doesn't budge. He stares down at me, and I can see when it clicks. All the confusion leaves his face and is replaced with clarity.
"You're seriously high right now?" he growls. "Are you out of your mind? You have a murder trial in a month and a half, and you decide now is a good time to fall off the damn wagon?"
"Don't pretend like you care now. You'r
e nothing but a fucking traitor."
"I was trying to protect you!"
Balling my fist, I manage to get enough leverage to wind up and knock him right in the jaw. He releases me to grip the side of his face, and I'm finally able to throw him off.
"Protect me?" I shout in outrage as I get up. "Face it, Carter. You were only protecting yourself."
He stands and shoves me backward as I try to walk by him. "Cut the betrayal shit, Jace! You know damn well I've always had your back."
"Then why didn't you tell me? Huh?" I growl. "Why didn't you fucking tell me?"
"Leave it alone, Jace," he orders.
Not a chance. "Stop being a pussy and answer the question."
"No."
I push his shoulder just hard enough to piss him off. "Tell me!"
"Because I didn't want you to die!" he snaps.
"I'm already fucking dead!" I yell back. "Don't you get that? Your best friend is gone! He fell off the roof with Davianna and splattered all over the fucking pavement!"
As Carter storms into my bedroom, I wonder if he finally realized what a lost cause I am, but instead, he comes back with a piece of my broken mirror. Without a bit of hesitation, he grabs my wrist and slices right into my palm. I rip myself from his grasp, but it's too late.
"What the fuck!"
He keeps his eyes locked on mine. "You feel that, right? That pain. That aching sting that tells you you're hurt. That's your body fighting to stay alive." Without looking away, he lifts up his hand and cuts into his own flesh. The blood starts to trickle out and slides down to his wrist. "You bleed, I bleed. You die, I die. That was the pact, remember? From the playground to the grave."
I shake my head, not even paying attention to the blood pooling in my hand. "It's too late for me. It's too fucking late."
