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When Colton showed up, for a moment I wondered if maybe I had wished myself back in time, like a reverse ’13 Going On 30’ kind of thing. But the engagement ring still sat heavily on my finger and he was still wearing the button down he had on when I left. Realizing he dipped out on his date early made me feel better than it should have. At least for the time being, I didn’t have to come to terms with him dating someone else. And when he stood in front of me, looking at me like I held his heart in my hands, I couldn’t hold back anymore.
“Tell me what to do, Iv.”
She gives me a sad smile. “I don’t know what to tell you. I wouldn’t know what to do in your situation either.”
“I don’t want to hurt Parker. He doesn’t deserve it.”
“Maybe not, but does he deserve to be married to someone who only stayed with him out of obligation?”
I sigh. “That’s not the only reason I’d stay with him. I love him.”
“And that’s where the problem lies. You love Parker, but you’ve always been in love with Colton.”
Groaning, I throw my face back into her pillow. I wish I could tell her she’s wrong. That I fell out of love with Colton during the four years I spent trying to forget his existence, and maybe I had. But the second he walked into Maverick’s living room looking like he came straight from my every fantasy, all the progress I’d made was instantly undone. In just a few words, I was right back to crushing hard on my brother’s best friend, only this time he was off limits for other reasons.
My mind has been a ping pong game lately between forgiving him for the past and holding it against him for the rest of our lives. The image of him walking away as I broke into pieces is still burned into my brain and I’m not sure it’ll ever fully go away. It took a year before I could handle hearing his name without becoming an emotional train wreck; two before I would even consider dating someone else. If I let him in again, if I give him that part of me and it happens again, I won’t have somewhere to run this time. I’ll be stuck living in a world where he’s a constant fixture.
“How do I know he won’t hurt me again?”
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sp; Ivy wraps her arms around me and holds me close. “You don’t. You just have to ask yourself if it’s worth the risk.”
As I’m thinking it over, my phone vibrates in my pocket. I pull it out and see a text from Colton. I’d be lying if I said I don’t get excited by the simple sight of his name. I swipe it open immediately.
Colton: I know this may seem a little backwards considering the last 24 hours, but can I take you out tonight?
The corners of my mouth raise and Ivy coos from behind me, showing she’s reading over my shoulder.
McKenna: Like, on a date?
Colton: Yes Mac. On a date.
I don’t answer right away. Instead, I toss my phone down on the bed and put my head in my hands. When did my life become so messy? A few weeks ago, I expected to move home and spend the summer planning my wedding. I knew I’d see Colton at one point or another, but I genuinely believed he had moved on. None of this is anything close to what I imagined.
“Go.” Ivy nudges me.
“What? How? Parker is going to wonder where I am.”
“So, tell him you’re with me.”
My eyebrows furrow. “You think I should have a secret affair with Colton?”
“Well, from where I’m standing, what other option do you have? You’re too afraid to leave Parker for Colton because he has the track record of a convicted criminal. So, you can either play it safe and avoid Colton as best you can – since lord knows you two can’t be in a room together without wanting to rip each other’s clothes off – or you can sneak around for a bit and figure out what it is you want.”
I run my fingers through my hair. “I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right.”
“Maybe not, but do you really want to spend the rest of your life wondering what if?”
I CAN HEAR THE engine of Colton’s car as he pulls into the driveway. He had told me not to wear anything fancy, but the workout clothes I was sporting from earlier didn’t seem like proper date attire. I borrowed a pair of jeans and a crop top from Ivy, and took a shower at her place. As far as Parker is concerned, I’m having a girls’ night.
When I walk out to the car, Colton goes around to the passenger side, opening the door like a total gentleman. He greets me with a kiss on the cheek.
“I missed you.”
I chuckle. “I saw you like six hours ago.”
“Five hours and 59 minutes too long.”
