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Still looking at what his hands held, Pop said, “Those of you new to the club, you don’t know me. In Tulsa, I was SAA for more than twenty years. The Bulls have been my life since I could call myself a man.” He looked up and spoke directly to his brothers from two charters. “My old lady and me, we raised our boys in this life, and both our boys are at this table with us now. I gotta say, my proudest days were the days my sons became Bulls. Until today. Zach is my oldest. Not a day in his life I haven’t been proud as fuck to be his dad. When Coop told me he meant to name Zach his SAA ... well, I don’t know how to say how it felt. But I can tell you that today is my proudest day as a father, and I’m honored Coop invited me to do this. Zach, get up here, son.”
Zach had watched his brother for part of their father’s speech, and he saw how Jay struggled with the subtext they both heard. But right now, Zach was caught in his own vortex of emotion and couldn’t be worried about his little brother. He went to their father.
Pop held out the rocker and flash:Sergeant at Arms. As Zach took them in his own hands, Pop held on.
“There wasn’t a day I wore a flash like that I wasn’t proud of it. Being a Bull was who I was, who I still am. To see you take this flash, son ... I don’t have the right words, so I’ll just say it’s important. But not because I think it means you’re following my road. It’s important because I know it’syourroad, and you found it on your own. Congratulations, my boy.”
He handed the pieces over, then put his hand on the back of Zach’s head and pulled him close until their foreheads touched.
“You had the right words, Pop,” Zach whispered, trying to keep his voice steady.
Pop shifted, and Zach felt his old man’s lips quivering on his forehead.
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~oOo~
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Because Gargo’s funeralwas the next day, the Nevada charter was being launched with a wake rather than a party. They’d decided not to try to adopt any Mojave traditions into the charter but to respect each patch’s own heritage, let the ones they lost be put to rest in the way that best suited them, and build the charter traditions to be flexible for that.
On this evening, after church, the Bulls and their loved ones had a mellow celebration of their own, at the Haddons’ again. This house had become their de facto clubhouse as well as Zach’s actual, if temporary, residence.
Definitely temporary. He wanted to get a place with Lyra, and the sooner the better. She’d been waffling, worried about leaving her dad and brother to manage on their own. One good thing about Melody and Ben maybe being back together: if Melody moved in, Lyra could move out without worrying about her dad.
Zach stood in the back yard now with his arm around Lyra. They were talking with Reed, Kai, Duncan, Simon’s son Sam, and Caleb’s son James. For years, any group that included Zach and Dunc also included Jay, but Zach’s little brother had made himself scarce all day. Since church.
Really fucking tired of Jay’s drama, Zach kissed Lyra’s head, excused himself from the group, and went to hunt up his brother.
He found him in the spare room off the kitchen. The developers of this subdivision had probably called it a ‘chef’s planning room’ or something like that, but it was really just a little room, about eight by eight, with a bunch of shelves built in on one wall. The Haddons used it as office storage, and as a safe place for Brutus to go when there were too many people around. He got agitated and aggressive around too many strangers. You didn’t want an agitated, aggressive direwolf bounding through your party.
Jay was on the floor in that little room, with Brutus’s head on his lap. He was stroking the dog’s belly.
The dog looked up when Zach opened the door and banged it into Jay’s knee. Seeing it was Zach, Brutus returned to his hedonistic massage.
“Hey,” Jay said without looking up.
“Hey. Why are you hiding in here?”
With a petulant shrug, Jay answered, “Better company in here.”
Zach was just completely fucking tired of his brother’s bullshit. Jay was twenty-two years old. He wasn’t a kid anymore, and he’d never been a chick, but he was acting like a fucking drama queen.
“Are we ever gonna talk about what your fucking problem is, Jacob?”
Jay’s head yanked up and he glared at Zach. “Don’t fuckin’ use my name like you’re Pop revving up a lecture. Fuck off. You’re not my dad and never were. You just act like it.”
“So the answer is no. You’re gonna pout and not tell me why you’re so pissed.”
“I’m notpouting. I’m pissed, and you know exactly why. If you don’t, you’re a fucking retard and I’m not gonna waste my time on you.” He returned his attention to Brutus, who’d picked up the tense vibe and was watching their argument warily.
“Mom would ream your ass for using that word,” Zach told his brother.
“Yeah, well, fuck her too.”
For a moment, Zach could only stand there with his mouth open. Neither of themevertalked about Mom like that. Part of him wanted to punch Jay in his whiny, disrespectful mouth.
Then, sadly, he saw there was nothing he could do right now to get his brother to talk this out with him.
