Page 49 of His Innocent Muse

“No,” she fidgets, “Not the whole—”

She shouldn’t even be standing. The elevator doors open on my loft, and I scoop her into a bridal carry. She lets out a surprised gasp, draping her arms around my neck.

I intend to move, but as soon as I step over the threshold, I freeze.

She’s back in my space again. And it truly does feel…like I’m bringing her home. As terrifying as that should be, the anxiety never comes.

The doors close behind us, and I wish I could lock them, bar them, chain them and the stair door closed so she’ll never leave again.

She glances around, her previously happy expression falling into concern, her bottom lip locking under her teeth.

That’s right. Answers. That’s what I need.

I carry her straight to the kitchen and set her on the island. Her knees cock wide enough for me to step right between them, hips butting against the counter.

“Oh,” she exhales, eyes widening as she slaps her palms on the counter.

Hmm. Maybe I’m scaring her. Good on one hand, because she should be scared, but bad for conversation.

I don’t lean back, but I do take a second to tame my no doubt wild hair, and adjust my jacket, speaking as I do.

“I’m sorry if I’m coming off a bit strong, I…”

She holds her breath, the vein in her neck fluttering. I war with what to say, what to admit, but the truth crashes out.

“...thought I lost you.”

I’d been expecting any number of reactions, but not tears. They spill down her cheeks in single file as she stares at me.

“Don’t cry, Firefly,” I murmur, wiping each cheek.

“I thought you hated me,” she whispers.

I shake my head slowly, working my hands under her legs next, and palming her calves. “No. I could never. Is that why you left?”

“No,” she stutters a breath, immediately drawing in on herself.

I tap the sides of her legs with my thumbs. “Stay with me, Lucy. What happened after I left?”

Her gaze snaps up. So much confusion and pain swimming in it, my heart stalls.

"T-That's what happened. You left."

What…

Memories flash through my mind as I reconstruct our time together. The image of her clutching my towel, struggling to pull herself together and bury the hurt for my sake, flickers behind my eyes. The last time I saw her before I…

Oh, no.

Blood drains from my face in a slow leak, pooling in my stomach. I stumble back a step, one hand locked around my jaw.

Reality hits me with enough force that I wish I’d died before failing her so horribly. I left her in a sub-drop.

“I’m so sorry,” I whisper. I can’t unclench my fingers, they just keep digging harder at my jaw.

“It’s, I mean, it sucked. But it’s okay.”

“It’s not, Lucy. You don’t understand.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com