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I flinch at the startlingly accurate description. “Yeah.” My face heats with embarrassment, and I can’t bring myself to look at Charlie. “It was dark and tempting.”
Giselle lets out a long sigh. “I was hoping this wouldn’t happen. At least not for a few hundred years. I like you, Nora.”
That does not sound good.
“Why?” Terrance demands. “What’s going on?”
Giselle meets his eyes with an uncharacteristically grave expression. “It’s the curse.”
I exchange glances with my guys. They all look just as confused as me, except Illren. He looks suspicious. I’m not sure why. Could be just his go-to expression when he’s not looking bored.
“Curse?” Oliver asks.
Giselle nods. “All sirens eventually get overwhelmed by their curse and become dangerous. They lose control. The last one in the Great Lakes was killed after she started taking out entire ships, killing hundreds of human sailors at a time. That particular myth about sirens is true. Eventually, they all go crazy.”
“What kind of curse is it?” Terrance asks.
Illren steps up to the rail, gripping it tightly. “How do we break it?”
Giselle frowns at him. “You don’t.” She shifts her gaze to me. “Remember when I told you that the first sirens’ magic was born from a curse placed on them by the Summer King?”
“Yeah…?”
Illren goes rigid. His eyes fill with understanding. “Power born from any curse is always dark.”
Giselle nods and gives me a sympathetic smile. “Your power itself is the curse.”
“Dark magic,” Terrance growls.
Giselle nods again. Her demeanor is now sad, as if she’s genuinely sorry for my plight. Or maybe she feels like she’s already lost me as a friend. “And like with all dark magic, the more you use it, the more it takes over. I heard what happened in the club a few weeks ago. Using that much of your power likely awakened something in you.”
I can’t really process what she’s telling me. I’m a dark magic user? The only dark magic user I’ve ever known was Elijah—the psycho sorcerer who kidnapped a bunch of underworlders and stabbed me because he wanted my blood sacrifice. He was off the rails. Is that my future?
My stomach churns, and my breathing becomes erratic. Sensing my panic, Rook squeezes me in a tight hug. “Just because you have dark magic doesn’t mean you have to use it.”
Illren cuts Rook a sharp look. “It won’t be that easy. There’s a reason sirens throughout history have been hunted down and killed. They’re dangerous. Deadly.”
I can’t help but wonder if that was part of my appeal to Illren. Like calls to like…darkness calls to darkness.
Illren shakes his head, as if mentally chastising himself. “I should have put this together sooner.”
Giselle nods. “I hoped that being raised human would keep you wary of your power, and you’d stay your sweet self a long time,” she says sadly.
I don’t like the way she makes my fall sound inevitable. “So that’s it? I’m cursed to slowly slip into darkness?”
“What about us?” Rook asks. “Isn’t that the point of her having so many men? So she can control her power?”
“Oh, yes.” Giselle nods enthusiastically. “That’s a big part of it. The more content the siren, the less the curse can take hold.”
TheI told you solook Illren shoots me is not surprising. “You’re not as content as you should be,” he says. And yes, he says it like an accusation.
I want to stick my tongue out at him, but he’s right. I’ve been holding myself back out of fear. I want the physical intimacy Illren keeps insisting I need. I do. I just don’t know how to get past my PTSD. Sometimes I feel like I’m making huge progress, and other times I think I’ll never be free of my fear.
A heavy silence stretches out between the entire group. We’re all thinking about the same thing. I know none of them blame me for my issues, but I still feel like it’s all somehow my fault. Logically, I know it isn’t. I’m a victim. I’m not to blame for what all those men did. But I can’t help feeling like I’m not strong enough to overcome the trauma. Heaviness settles in my chest, and I swallow back my emotions. “I’m trying,” I whisper.
“We know,” Oliver promises while Illren says, “Not hard enough.”
“Illren!” Terrance snaps.
