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“Will you stop fucking lying?” Nik said violently. From everywhere people stared, and never in his life had he been involved in this kind of scene. Never in life had he lost control this way, never in his life had he felt this betrayed.
Why did he care so much, Nik wondered dully. He had known Beth Lewis for years. He had known Daria for over a week, and yet it was Daria who made him feel like the pain inside him wouldn’t ever go away.
“Why do you insist on lying when you know I already know the truth?” Nik’s accent thickened as his bitterness threatened to spill out of him. “Why drag this—-”
“Because I love—-”
“Stop lying! Do I look that fucking stupid to you? I know who you are. Do you hear me, Daria? I know you’re a woman who had almost as many men as there are days in a month.” Merely speaking the words made Nik want to fly into a rage because even now – even now he despised the idea of Daria being with another man, and the thought filled him with such jealous rage he heard himself lashing out, “What’s my goddamn number, Daria? Can you still remember? Am I your thirtieth? Do you need one or two more to complete a fucking page in your calendar?”
Nik’s words were no worse than a public stoning, and he wanted to take them back as soon as he said them. He waited for Daria to slap him – she deserved to.
But instead, Daria’s wide gray eyes were filled with pain.
For him.
Nik stiffened.
“I’m so sorry,” Daria whispered.
The words were like a slap to his face, forcing him to accept the truth.
Somehow, some fucking way, Daria knew. He could see it in her eyes, and it became impossible to deny.
He had fallen in love with her.
And she had hurt and used him in return.
Daria forced herself to stand up. “Nik, I’m sorry.” The entire time Nik had spoken, she hadn’t just heard his words. She had also heard what Nik hadn’t said, and suddenly the truth became obvious. Suddenly, everything became clear. Why he was being so cruel, why he wanted her out of his life for good.
Oh God, why have I been such a fool?
Why?
Why did I have to lie to him?
That first time they met – that first time God had given him to her – it had been just as special for Nik as it had been to her. That first time had been enough for Nik – the same way it had been enough for her – to think that she was the right one for him.
But in return, she had made him feel like a fool. She had lied to Nik because of her stupid pride and her even more stupid fears, and those lies had destroyed everything.
She looked at Nik, and the words just spilled out. “Nik, I’m so sorry.” His face turned white at her words, and her heart wept for him. “I’m sorry,” she repeated brokenly. “I’m sorry I was so stupid—-”
“Shut up—-”
But she made herself continue, desperate for Nik to know she regretted everything. “I’m sorry I lied, I’m sorry I hurt you.”
Nik’s skin crawled with shame as he listened to Daria’s apology. It was like the past repeating itself, and the pain drowned him as the memories surged forward. He remembered Beth, remembered how, despite knowing that she was the one person he trusted and loved, she had still chosen to hurt him.
And the fucking idiot that he was, Nik thought dully, he was letting it happen again.
This woman in front of him – this woman knew she had the power to hurt him, this woman knew she had already hurt him, and yet here she was now, crying fake goddamn tears so she could get back to Nik, and the worst thing was, he wanted to take her back.
“Damn you.” He spun away from her and didn’t look back as he walked out on her for the last time.
“Nik, please, wait, please.”
He heard her footsteps behind him and knew Daria was doing her best to run after him despite her ridiculous high heels. His self-hatred deepened.
Goddamn her. If Daria had an ounce of decency in her, she would just let him be. But here she was, running after him, and it could only mean one thing.
