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Prologue
“Ican’t believe you’re doing this, Rye. It’s insane. Are you sure you don’t want to wait just a little longer?” I know my question is falling on love-deafened ears. My twin sister, Reilly, the one who swore black and blue she would never fall into the marriage trap, that she’d never trust a man with her heart… Well, she’s eating those words now, as we currently stand inside a dressing room in Vegas.
Yes, Vegas… Bray, her husband-to-be, flew us all to Vegas because, in his own words:I’m not waiting another goddamn day to make Reilly my wife.As far as brothers-in-law go, I don’t hate the thought of Bray being mine. He’s great; it’s clear just how much he loves my sister. Fiercely. I don’t really have any objections to the union, but I do feel it’s my sisterly duty to let her know it’s okay to change her mind at the last minute.
“I’m more than sure, Hol. I can’t imaginenotspending the rest of my life with him.” Her smile lights up her face. “Plus, there’s also that damn pierced cucumber. I just can’t give that thing up. It’s an addiction like no other.”
“Ew, gross.” This response comes from Ella, Bray’s eighteen-year-old sister.
“You know, I have to agree with Ella.Ew, gross—and let’s not ever mention Bray’s cucumber again.” Alyssa scrunches up her face; she’s one of our best friends and also happens to be newly married to Bray’s brother, Zac. “Come on, El, let’s go clean out our innocent ears.”
Alyssa shuts the door behind them, leaving me alone with Reilly. I feel like I haven’t really had much one-on-one time with my sister since… well, since she met Bray. Their start was rough; it took Reilly a while to come to terms with the idea of being in love. Then, when she had finally accepted it, Bray got shot and ended up in a coma. Those were a hard few months, watching Reilly try to be strong, when she was actually breaking down inside.
I still blame myself for Bray’s injury. If I hadn’t walked into that building…at that moment… If the gun hadn’t turned on me… If I had donesomething, instead of nothing—instead of freezing—would he have been so stupid? Would he have antagonized that madman? I can’t even remember what Bray said, but he managed to get the barrel trained back on him within seconds.Seconds…I only had that gun pointed at me for seconds—yet those same, few, frozen seconds changed everything.
Shaking the thoughts from my head, I focus back on the here and now. It’s Reilly’s wedding day. I won’t let anything ruin this.
“You know, I’d always envisioned Dad walking me down the aisle...” My twin looks out the window.
“Obviously, he would be here if he could, Rye. It’s probably breaking his heart, knowing this is happening without him.” The feelings I have for my father are hard to even acknowledge. I love him—he’s my dad. He was the one man I could always depend on when we were growing up.
Until life went to shit…
First, my brother was killed by a drunk driver. Then, my dad took matters into his own hands after that driver got off with little more than a slap on the wrist. On the day of the court hearing, I learnt how my dad had shot the guy point blank.In the head.And our family hasn’t been the same since. Mum, Reilly, and I have stuck together, doing our best to support each other through all of this.
“I know, but I just… It’d just be nice if they could be here: Mum, Dad… Dylan.” Reilly gets a distant look in her eyes before shaking her head. “At least I have you. We’ll always have each other, Hol. That’s enough for me.”
Crap…As soon as Bray woke up from his coma, I decided I wasn’t satisfied going through the motions of everyday life anymore. I decided to make a change. I want to live. I want to experience things I never would have dreamt of before.
That’s why I applied for a working visa and a teaching job in New York. And to my surprise, I got both. I haven’t told Reilly yet, but I won’t be travelling back to Sydney with them next week. I’ll be heading straight from here to The Big Apple. Straight to my new life. My new adventures. The new Holly.
ChapterOne
Okay, Holly, you’ve got this.Just one foot in front of the other.You can do it.
Ican do it. I’m a grown-ass woman for God’s sake. How hard can it be to navigate my way through the JFK Airport? Extremely freaking hard, considering I’ve always managed to get lost in Sydney, which seems like nothing but a tiny airstrip in comparison to what I’m looking at now.
I count down from ten—to try to relax my frayed nerves. I only manage to get to eight before someone shoves into me without so much as a glance or apology. I’m not even out of the airport, and I’m already questioning my decision (and my sanity) in choosing New York as the place to find the new me.
Holly 2.0? Yeah, she’s nowhere to be seen yet. My eyes are starting to sting. I clamp my hands into fists at my sides. I will not cry—well, not here anyway. I’ll wait until I’m behind closed doors, where no one can see me.Or my meltdown.Thanks to the trust fund my dad set up for me, I was able to score an awesome-looking apartment in Carnegie Hill.
I’ve refused to touch that money for the last five years. Mostly because I was pissed off at my dad—still am. But desperate times and all… There’s not exactly a lot you can get on a teacher’s salary in New York. I didn’t want to be making a long commute to work every day, so I tapped into that account and paid a six-month lease on a cute little one-bedroom, one-bathroom unit.
The school I’ll be teaching at is elite. According to their website, it’s super selective and high tech, with a bloody ten-year waiting list.Though I’m not entirely sure who the hell is enrolling a child before they are even born yet.The facilities are state of the art—no expense spared, or so I’m told—while the faculty is made up of the best and the brightest in their fields. Despite a little culture shock, I’m actually excited to settle into my new classroom.
That being said, I have two weeks tosettleinto this new city first. And somehow, I feel likethatis going to be harder than I first thought. Determination has me straightening my spine, picking my head up, and following the crowd to baggage claim. I can do this. My phone clenched in one hand, my other clutching the strap of my carry-on bag on my shoulder, I stalk forward.
Everything is going to be okay.
Twenty minutes later, I’m finally sitting in a cab on my way to my new apartment. Butterflies fill my stomach as both nerves and excitement flutter about. The landlord said he’d be there when I arrived to hand over the keys and show me inside. I still have to finish furnishing the apartment. I was able to organize a bedroom suite and linen, scheduling to have them delivered a few days ago—the landlord was kind enough to send me a photo of the layout. I’ll arrange everything else over the next two weeks. I’m looking forward to it, actually. Putting my own touches on my own space. Did I mention this is the first time I’ve ever lived by myself?
Up until now, I’ve lived with my mother. And until Reilly met Bray, so did she. I wonder how Mum is doing by herself now… I’m sure she’ll be fine. She’s the strongest person I know. She’s already endured the worst thing that could ever happen to someone: losing a child. And not long after, she lost her husband as well, though heisstill alive and she could go visit him. If he’d let her…
My dad has a thing about not wanting my mum to see him behind bars, so they haven’t been face-to-face since that day in court. Instead, they write letters to each other every week. How their love has stayed intact through everything, I have no idea. But I envy it. I want it. One day. Not today though. Today, I am happy to explore and navigate this new life.By myself.
No expectations. No real major life goals or plans, other than justto be.
“This is it, ma’am.” The taxi driver stops by a block of tall townhouses and cranes his neck to look at me. “That’ll be fifty-six.”
