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* * *
Holly’s asleep on my chest. I think I literally fucked her into slumber. She crashed after the fifth orgasm I drew out of her. I make a mental note to call Doc and find out just how much her body can take in her condition. Fuck, I probably shouldn’t have been as rough as I was with her; she offered me a piece of heaven, an escape, and I fucking took it with everything I had.
My phone’s been vibrating for the last ten minutes. I’ve been ignoring it. I know if it were anything too urgent, I’d have Neo knocking on my door. Neo… Fuck. I bet he’s gone and done what I warned him not to fucking do. I told him to stay under the radar, not go out looking for a fucking bullet between the eyes. I should have known better than to let him out of my sight.
I slide Holly off my body and place her head on the pillows next to me. I reach over and dig through the pockets of my pants, and find my phone before scrolling through my messages.
Fuck! I get up and quickly jump in the shower prior to getting dressed again. After strapping two Glocks and two knives to my body, I throw on my jacket and walk back into the bedroom. Holly’s just starting to stir. “Dolcezza, I have to go out for a bit. Stay in the house. Don’t go outside, okay?”
She jolts upright, and I’m struck dumb at the sight of her naked breasts. “T, where are you going?” she asks.
“Ah, just out. Stay inside the house,” I repeat before leaning down to kiss her forehead.
Her hands cling to the lapels of my jacket. “Please stay. Don’t go. T, just stay, please. Let someone else go.”
Fuck me, her pleas pierce straight through my heart. I wish I could do what she’s asking of me. But I can’t. “Dolcezza, I can’t send anyone else. I’ll be fine. I’ll be back before you know it.”
“I can’t live in a world where you don’t exist, T. Don’t make me have to endure that. Promise me that you’ll be back.”
“Tornerò sempre da te. Ti voglio bene. Always.”
“I love you too.”
I pry her hands off me and walk out the door, willing myself not to look back. Because if I do, I might just cave and give her what she wants.
ChapterTwenty
He left hours ago. He should be back by now, right? Surely, whatever it is that called him away from me wasn’t that bad. I have to believe that it wasn’t that bad. I’m going out of my bloody mind with worry. I place a hand on my stomach and inhale deeply. My anxiety cannot be good for this little pea-sized baby. I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure you’re not meant to experience too much stress during pregnancy.
I need to calm my nerves. Usually, I’d pour myself a shot of tequila or a glass of wine, but I can’t do that right now. I can’t do anything other than wander around this huge museum of a house… and wait.
Wait for Theo to walk through the front door. Wait for the demons to step out of the shadows. Wait for someone to tell me my husband isn’t coming back.
Theo has a contract on his head. I don’t think he meant to let that bit of information slip out during his breakdown earlier, but he did. And I can’t help but think someone has cashed in on that contract. I can’t lose him. I won’t lose him. I want to call him. Text him.Something.I just need a goddamn sign that he’s coming home to me. I stop pacing outside T’s office and turn the handle; the door opens and I step inside. Flicking the light on, I walk along the bookshelf, inspecting the piles of books on display.
I know T said this was his dad’s office. All of this stuff must have belonged to Mr. Valentino. I imagine it’s hard for him to be here, to be the one sitting behind the desk. I know he always knew he’d take over as head of the family, but he never thought it would be this early.
I pick up a photo of a very young Theo with his parents. They seem happy. Normal. His dad is looking down at him, smiling. There’re photos of T, alone, at all stages of his life. You can tell his dad was proud of him. He was very much a loved son. That’s evident in these frames. I wonder if Theo knew just how much he meant to his dad?
I pause on an image of T, Neo, and Lana as teenagers. Have they heard from her? I have her number in my phone. Maybe I should give her a call… see if she’s okay. I go and curl up on the couch, pulling the throw blanket over me. Then I let the tears fall. I’m not angry that T left. He’s just gone to work. That’s all it is. But if I’m honest, I am scared.
Scared that this is the future I have to look forward to. Will I have to explain to our child why daddy isn’t home for dinner? Will I have to hide the fact that I’m worried? Anxious?
I’ll do whatever I have to do. The alternative, leaving New York and going back to Sydney without T, that’s not the life I want. I swipe at the tears on my cheeks and sit up. I need to shake myself out of this. I need to stop sulking and start acting. I can do this. When T comes home, I don’t want him finding me upset. That will only place more burden on his shoulders. I’m going to get better at being the wife he needs, the support he deserves. He does everything for me. He’s always trying to make sure I don’t want or need for anything. I have to start doing that for him.
I sit at his desk and open the laptop. The predictable password box pops up. I’ve seen T enter a combination of numbers before. I’ve just never really paid attention to what they were. I try: 1410. The date we signed our marriage papers, since it worked the last time on the burner phone. It’s not that. I type in the next significant date I can think of, before finally entering in yesterday’s date. The day we found out we were pregnant. Bingo, the screen comes to life. He must have changed it almost immediately after finding out.
We have three days left until we get the keys to the house I chose. I’m still in shock that T just bought the property. He didn’t even look at the whole estate. He said if that’s the house I wanted, then that’s all that mattered. I want to make it more than a house though. I want it to be a home. Our home. I want to fill the walls with laughter, fun, love, and happiness. I want our children to always have a home they can come back to.
Like this house is for T. Like my parents’ house is for me. I know I could always go home, and my mum and dad would welcome me with open arms. I know that my old bedroom will look exactly the same as it did when I left.
I do a Google search for furniture stores in New York. I don’t know where to even start. The apartment was one thing, but that house is so big I wonder how we will ever completely furnish it. I know I shouldn’t… but I search through T’s emails for the documents from the sale. They were easy enough to find. I open the attachment with the floor plan. I’m going to just go room by room. I start with the master bedroom. That is where we seem to spend most of our time, so I want to pick out our bedroom furniture first, and then I’ll move on to the rest of the house.
* * *
I startle at the noise coming from the foyer. I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here, getting lost in the online shopping portal, but I’ve just ordered furniture for our bedroom, one living room, a dining table, and a heap of kitchen appliances and utensils. I kept waiting for Theo’s fancy black cards to decline. It became more of a game: how much can I spend before it tells me it’s too much? I didn’t cheap out either, already raking up several hundred grand for just a few rooms. I wonder what Theo will think about the items I’ve purchased.
I know he’s back. If the voices carrying through the house didn’t tell me, that sense of calm that rushed over me a moment ago would have. I should go and see what all the chaos is about. But before I can get up, the door pushes open and T walks in with Neo right behind him. They both stop when they see me at the computer.
