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CHAPTER TWELVE
THEISLANDWAS a haven, but not from Tessa’s thoughts. The longer they remained, the harder it was to fight the inner knowledge she was wrestling with, the love that was taking hold of her, that scared the hell out of her, because of how vulnerable that love would make her. Neither of them wanted a marriage built on love, but she could no longer deny to herself the feelings that were stirring through her, feelings she’d always had for Alex. Why else would his rejection have hurt so damned much?
If she told him how she felt, it would be an unbearable burden.
She knew what he feared most in the world; she knew how he felt about love.
She’d heard the rich emotion in his voice when he’d spoken of his parents’ marriage, of his mother’s love for his father, and how that love had been her downfall. What would his protective instincts do if she told him—or even just showed him—her love?
A lump formed in her throat as she stared out at the early morning coastline, the trees almost silver in the cool morning light.
He could never know the truth.
She wasn’t aware of Alex’s approach, but the fragrance of coffee curled around her and she cast a look over her shoulder, her heart giving an enormous jump at the sight of him, dressed in a suit now—like the Alex he’d been on the day she’d proposed this marriage.
‘You’re a little overdressed for our island vibe,’ she observed with a sideways tilt of her head.
His smile was like warm honey on her spine, and she shivered, taking the coffee with a grateful smile that felt tight on her lips.
‘I have meetings in Athens today.’
‘Ah.’ Another shiver, this time shaped by the idea of the city. It wasn’t geographically far, but at the same time it was a million miles away from Epíneio.
He crouched beside her, tailored trousers straining across his haunches, drawing her gaze, stirring hunger in the pit of her stomach. She sipped her coffee, closing her eyes as the taste assaulted her senses.
‘I’m signing some contracts, otherwise I’d have someone else handle things in my place.’ He lifted a finger to her cheek, feeling the soft flesh, a smile on his lips as her own parted on a sigh.
She moved her face slightly, so her mouth touched his fingers, and his pupils dilated, passion immediately visible. He pulled his hand away; they both knew what would happen if he didn’t.
She loved him. The words were bursting out of her, as surely as the waves were rolling towards the coastline. She wanted to say them. She wanted to tell him.
It was this place, she realised, eyes wide. Here, on the island, everything was simple and elemental. They were just a man and a woman, biologically programmed to be together, to want each other, and, for Tessa, to love. The heart she’d sworn would never work again was now working overtime, racing whenever Alex so much as breathed near her.
But the island magnified all those feelings. Here, there were no distractions, no reminders of who she was and the life she had to live. She was running away here, and she couldn’t do that any longer.
‘I’ll come with you,’ she said decisively. ‘To Athens, I mean.’
He cocked a brow, regarding her thoughtfully. ‘It’s not necessary. I’ll be back before dinner—tomorrow, at the latest.’
Something panged in the region of her heart. For Tessa, the idea of that separation was unbearable, and for him, it rated nothing more than a lift of one shoulder. Nothing could illustrate their different feelings more than that.
‘No.’ She couldn’t let herself be this woman, so completely in love with him, waiting for him to return. ‘I’d like to see my parents, maybe catch up with some friends.’ She pushed to standing, finishing her coffee in one gulp. ‘I can get ready quickly, okay?’
Her stomach was in knots as his helicopter came in over Athens, the city bleak despite the perfect, golden morning. Landmarks she’d loved all her life, that had fascinated her for their history and culture, now felt like barbed wire against her skin. This was her real life, but she was dreading returning to it. Not because of Jonathan and whatever else he might have said during his time on the show, but because here, in Athens, she knew she would have to put distance between herself and Alex. They wanted this marriage to last, and the only way she could survive a life married to him was to find a way to coexist with the love she felt. That meant returning to the boundaries she’d originally insisted on, and those boundaries would be so much easier to enforce here.
‘I’ll be done by lunch. Shall we go and see your parents together?’
So much for space and boundaries. ‘You could talk to Dad about taking over.’
‘You’re sure you don’t mind?’
She lifted her shoulders. ‘It’s not up to me.’
Dissatisfaction was obvious in his features. ‘None the less, I’d like to know you approved before I suggested it.’
‘It will be good for Dad,’ she said softly.
‘But how do you feel about it?’
