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Whatever it is, I can’t deal with it.
Not now.
Not before I head inside to god only knows what.
“Are you ready?” he asks, breaking into the chaotic whirl of my thoughts.
With a nod, my fingers slip around the handle and pop open the door. The fresh air that rushes over my cheeks as I step onto the wide expanse of lawn helps clear my head. I don’t get more than a few strides before Asher reaches my side. His larger hand slips around mine as we make our way to the house.
Before I can chicken out and back away from the front porch, he presses the doorbell. A fresh round of nerves detonates at the bottom of my belly as I force myself to stand still instead of running away like every instinct is prodding me to do.
My wide gaze slides to Asher. I have no idea what I’d do if he weren’t standing beside me. I’ve never allowed myself to depend on anyone. What terrifies me most is that I’m unsure if the handsome football player can be trusted. The last thing I want to do is put my faith in someone who is ill equipped to handle it and will only let me down in the end. I’m not one of those it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all kinds of people. I’d prefer to skip the heartbreak altogether if possible.
“Thanks.”
His lips lift as he winks. “You’re welcome.”
The door swings open, and I find a pretty blonde woman standing on the other side of the threshold. Her gaze bounces from me to Asher. Surprise morphs across her features before being swiftly masked behind a polite smile. Although, the expression isn’t enough to cover the strain flooding her bright green eyes.
“Lola?”
“Yes.” With a nod, I thrust out my hand as manners take over. Even though only a couple of seconds have ticked by, there’s nothing about this interaction that doesn’t feel bizarre.
“It’s nice to finally meet you. I’m Charlotte.”
Her fingers are cool as she squeezes mine lightly before releasing them. As soon as she does, my arm falls back to my side. I have no idea what to say or do. My mouth feels like it’s packed full of cotton as sweat springs to my palms.
Her curious gaze resettles on the man at my side. “I didn’t realize you were bringing your boyfriend.”
Boyfriend?
Oh, no, no, no.
As I open my mouth to correct her, Asher steps in. “I thought Lola could use some support. I hope that’s not a problem.”
A mixture of emotions flickers in her eyes. “Of course not.” She retreats into the entryway before opening the door wider and ushering us inside. “Please, come in.”
As we step into the foyer, I can’t stop my gaze from bouncing around the vast double-story space. A fancy chandelier hangs suspended from the ceiling, throwing sparkling light throughout the area. There’s an oversized arrangement of colorful fresh flowers in a crystal vase on an antique side table near the door. A cluster of silver-framed photographs surrounds it. I don’t give them more than a cursory inspection, knowing I won’t find one of myself among them. If there’s a kernel of hurt attempting to bloom within me, I crush it before it can cause further damage.
“I thought we could get to know one another in the living room before dinner,” Charlotte says, breaking into the turmoil of my thoughts.
When Asher’s hand settles on the small of my back, I say, “Sure.”
Is it too late to give him a code word or eye twitch?
It takes effort to force my feet into movement as we cross the entryway with its elegant sweeping staircase before entering a long gallery and then, finally, arriving at another immense room. There are groupings of expensive furniture along with a black baby grand near a wall of floor-to-ceiling windows.
As I take in the luxurious surroundings, all I can think is that the man whose name appears on my birth certificate has been living twenty minutes away in a monstrosity of a house and couldn’t be bothered to visit. Or introduce me to his new family. Or help pay tuition for college so I might claw my way to a better life.
Charlotte stretches a slender arm toward a cream-colored sofa. “Why don’t you sit. Tony will be out shortly. He’s in his office, wrapping up a business call. Can I get you anything to drink?”
As much as I want to shake my head, I say, “A glass of water, please?” We’ve just arrived, and already my throat is parched.
With a nod, she glances at Asher. “For you as well?”
“That would be great. Thanks.”
She spins away, heels clicking against the ocean of hardwood that stretches as far as the eye can see before disappearing at the far end of the room.
