AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Tell me what you’re feeling, Aden.” I insist, while going to the fridge, and pulling out a pack of hamburger.
“Lost, dar—Hope. I’m not calling you darling. I don’t know what kind of ass I was before, but I’m not the kind of man to call a woman darling.”
“How do you know?”
“I feel it in my bones.”
“Oh. Um…well… you could just call me Hope?”
“Then, I feel lost, Hope. That’s how I’m feeling.”
“I imagine,” I whisper, turning away from him to wash my hands. “How do you feel about hamburgers?”
“I don’t know. Do I like them?”
“I…”
“Christ, I don’t even know if I’m allergic to them.”
My hand shakes at his answer. Are there people out there who are allergic to hamburger? I’d imagine there would have to be. Could Aden be? Shit. What happens if I feed him something that kills him?
“Though, I did eat ground beef in the hospital so I guess I’m not. God this is so frustrating.”
“I know, Aden, but—”
“But you don’t know. I’m taking so much on faith here. I know the paramedics and doctors said we were married and you were there when I fell, but how do I know? How do I know we’re married? That we even know each other? You could be some psychotic—”
“Daddy!”
My eyes cut to the door, Aden’s words still ringing in my head. Jack comes bursting through the kitchen and he screams out Daddy the minute he sees Aden. Then without so much as glancing at me, he makes a bee-line for Aden, wrapping his little body around Aden’s leg and thigh.
Color drains from my face, as I watch Aden stare down at Jack in horror. Slowly he moves his hand clumsily down to Jack’s back and pats him. My heart has stopped. Color has drained from my face. I have no idea what to say. I have no idea how to stop this avalanche of horror.
“I guess that answers that. We have a child?” Aden whispers, his voice hoarse and almost shaking.
“Uh… I got called into work early, so I had to bring Jack back sooner…” Daria says from the doorway. Her gaze goes from Aden and Jack and then cuts back to mine.
The fear in her eyes mirrors mine.
I’m screwed.
twenty-five
aden
I’m a father. I stare at the sleeping child and there are so many emotions going through me I can’t begin to describe them. Hope tried to convince me I wasn’t the child’s father, but it was kind of hard to deny when Jack is screaming for me and calling me Daddy, drowning out her denials.
I had been on the verge of telling Hope she was lying about being my wife. How can she be my wife, when nothing but the scent of her—which is a common enough smell—is familiar? I was about to disengage from the entire situation.
I was so close.
Three things held me back.
One… if I don’t belong here, I have nowhere to go. I belong nowhere. I have no memory. I have no idea who I really am.
Two… I can deny a lot, but when I’m close to Hope… it feels like my body remembers her, even if my mind can’t. I’m trying to do my best to hold onto that, because right now I need to feel like something is familiar, no matter how intangible it is.
Finally, the third reason I just didn’t load up and disappear. This little boy. Even if Hope was somehow lying to me about being my wife, having a child run in unannounced and proclaiming me his father… that shit is real. That can’t be made up…right?
Which means… I belong in this shit town, in this damn motel that looks like it belongs in the past, with a woman I apparently called darling, with a limp dick I take medicine for and a son… a son who calls me Daddy and begs me to play blocks on the floor with him—which we did... for hours.
“Aden?” Hope calls softly from the door.
I look over my shoulder toward her. Her face is etched with concern and worry. I swallow down my own doubts, my own fears, because whatever this is—besides a huge fucking mess—it has to be just as hard on Hope. What would it be like to be married to a man who doesn’t even recognize you? Her world must be as upside down as mine is… well almost.
At least she can remember her own son.
“He looks like you,” I tell her honestly. I’ve looked and looked but there’s very little resemblance to me.
“He does. My father says the family genes are strong, we seem to stomp out all others.”
“He’s beautiful,” I answer, feeling strange all the way around. I walk out of the room and don’t look back, even though I kind of want to.
“It’s late. You should get in bed. You’ve had a rough day,” Hope says, and for some reason she’s avoiding looking at me.
