AllFreeNovel
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Charlie
The conversation outside was getting too real, so of course I ran. We both came back into the house and joined the party which was an even bigger mistake. Simone has a karaoke machine set up in front of a big projector—The Cable Guy comes to mind—but I’m too nervous to laugh. Simone makes it her mission to push me out of my comfort zone. This super slutty dress is example A, but I know she means well. I helped her with all the slow tracks on her now platinum record, and she has always been overly thankful. She even sends presents to me at the studio and won’t take them back. It’s mostly designer clothes I would never feel comfortable wearing, but sometimes its flowers and food which I always enjoy.
I wrap myself up tight in Hudson’s shirt and do my best to ignore the sexy smell of it. I still can’t believe I word vomited like that. My awkward is reaching new heights, I guess. He was sweet, too sweet really, which made me freak out and force myself into this even worse scenario. The problem is that I really like him. Like him in all the ways we told each other were off the table.
“Charlie! Yes, you, my bitch, are so next.”
“Oh, um, no, thank you.” Simone has that look in her eye, and I’m starting to have a panic attack. There is no way I’m singing in front of all these people. “I was actually coming to say goodbye; my friend Lyla called and she’s in some trouble, nothing too terrible, but I really have to leave. I’m so sorry.” She isn’t listening to anything I’m saying as she drags me to the front of the room, but right before we get there, Hudson picks up the microphone, saving me.
“Sorry, ladies, but I have a song in my heart I just have to get out,” he jokes and throws me a wink as the music starts to play. I feel so relieved and find myself laughing when he sings the lyrics to “Love Shake.” He drips the confidence I wish I could have a taste of. Any taste of him would be invited as a matter of fact. But I stop that train of thought as I slowly make my way to the stairs and out the front door. I take a seat on the porch and order an Uber, having to wait for the guy who’s five minutes away. In the short amount of time I wait, Hudson bursts through the door and runs right by me down the stairs. I wonder where he’s going, but when he stops and looks around, hope rises inside me that maybe I’m not the only one feeling more than I should. I snap my gum to make a small noise, and he spins my way, smiling when he sees me.
“Hey. You’re still here. Want me to give you a lift?”
“Thanks, but I ordered an Uber, and you don’t have a car.” I give him a questioning look, and the most confident man I know looks to his feet and laughs at himself.
“Right. I don’t.” He skips a few steps to make it to the other chair beside me faster. “Can I ride with you? Make sure you get home okay?”
“Sure, but I will be just fine. I thought you would want to stay and party.”
“If I stayed, I would have to babysit the boys; if I’m not here, that means I can’t be blamed for all this shit in Simone’s nice house I am sure they will ruin.”
I laugh a bit as our car pulls up and we make our way back home.
“Thank you for saving me back there, by the way.”
“No worries, love. I’ve always got your back.”
Those words hit me more than they should, because not many people have ever had my back. Worst of all, I believe him.
That night I fall into bed and dream—dreams I have no right to. Of Hudson, a future where we walk hand in hand up to a stage, but instead of him going to the microphone it’s me. He whispers sweet and naughty things in my ear before he kisses me good luck. I walk out in front of millions of people cheering my name, and I play them my own music.
I wake in a sweat and cry because I liked myself better in my dream than I do when I’m awake. Big things need to happen for me to change, but I have to find a way. Deciding tomorrow starts a new day and even if I have to fake it until change happens, it is happening. Somehow, I will grow some lady balls and live my life.
