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I nod, but I don’t know how I’ll manage it. It might be too hard to stay in contact with someone I can’t have.
He kisses me, and I melt against him, getting lost in the feel of his body against mine, the taste of wine on his lips, and the way his heart beats next to mine as if we were made for each other.
I’m the one who breaks the kiss. I draw away. I want to collapse in a puddle of tears.
“Thank you for tonight,” I say. “Thank you for everything.”
“Have a safe flight,” Noah says.
I nod and hug him. He kisses me another time, and then I reluctantly let go of him and walk to the hotel doors. The doorman opens for me. Before I walk in, I look back one more time.
Noah stands by his car and he looks like he’s about to fall apart. I feel the same.
I steel myself and walk on, not allowing myself to look back a second time. I push the elevator button, wait for the doors to open, and step inside. It’s only when they slide closed that I allow myself to come undone, and tears roll down my cheeks.
Chapter 16
Raven
When we get ready to leave for the airport, the clouds are thick and heavy in the air and a cold breeze has picked up.
“What’s up with this weather?” I ask when Michelle and I stand in the lobby, waiting for our cab.
“It’s crazy out there,” the receptionist says. “The news says there’s a chance for a major blizzard.”
“It’s too late in the season for that, isn’t it?”
She only shrugs.
As we watch, snow starts to fall. In no time at all, the city is transformed into a winter wonderland.
The cab pulls up, and we hurry out into the snow, ducking against the wind when it whirls around us. The driver helps us load the bags into the trunk and we hurry to get into the car.
I rub my hands together and blow on them to warm up. Michelle shivers next to me.
“This is insane,” she says.
“It’s going to cause a huge pile-up,” the driver warns. “People lose their minds in the snow like this and accidents happen. What time is your flight?”
“Not for a few hours,” Michelle says.
“That should give you enough time to get there,” the driver agrees. Michelle looks relieved, but I’m not worried about getting to the airport as much as I worry about getting off the ground when the snow comes down like this. I look up as we pull off, and the sky is a deep gray with clouds threatening to unleash a lot more snow than we’re experiencing now.
“How was last night?” Michelle asks.
“I don’t really want to talk about it,” I say dully.
Michelle nods.
I don’t want to shut her down when she’s reaching out to me but talking about Noah is going to make me cry, and I can’t afford for that to happen. Once the tears start, they won’t stop, and I’m not going to allow myself to fall apart over something I knew had to come to an end from the start.
“Here we go,” the driver says, and we join the back of a long line of cars that try to make their way through the city. He cranes his neck to see what the hold-up is.
“I just don’t understand how this feels so wrong,” I say.
Michelle only looks at me, waiting for me to unpack whatever I need to talk about. “Leaving feels wrong. I mean, I know I have to go back home. Ava is waiting for me and we knew from the start this wasn’t going to happen. Hell, I thought I was going to hate Noah forever. But now, it doesn’t seem right to leave it like this. I can’t shake the feeling that I’m making some kind of mistake.”
When I look at Michelle, she looks sympathetic. “Love is hard.”
