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“I’m fine, I’m fine. I just need to take a deep breath, that’s all.” Mom waves her hand to dismiss the topic. I study her for a moment, but it looks like she recovers okay. I’m not happy with her health. I wish there was something I can do to help her. She’s spent most of her life either lying down at home or lying down in a hospital.
“Things are getting pretty serious with Natalie,” I say, instead of riding her about her health. I know the last thing she wants is for me to fuss about it. It’s been such a topic of conversation her whole life; she’s sick of it, I am sure.
“Really?” She sits up a little taller, her eyes sparkling. “Tell me.”
I grin. “She’s different than any woman I’ve met before. She’s been through a lot.” I tell her about her deceased husband and that she’s raising her daughter alone.
“That takes a lot of courage,” Mom says after I finish. “It changes a person when you have to go through so much.”
I wonder if she’s referring to herself, too, when she says that.
“Are you happy?”
“Happier than I’ve been in a long time,” I admit. “And I really want this to work with her. But I need your advice on something.”
“What?” Mom asks.
I take a deep breath. “It might not be anytime soon that I meet Kylie, but when I finally do…I have no idea how I’m going to fit into the picture. I have no idea what I’m doing when it comes to kids, and this isn’t a grow-as-they-grow thing.”
“Like when you have a new baby,” Mom says, understanding where I’m coming from.
“Right. She’s almost nine.”
Mom thinks about it for a bit. She clutches her chest with one hand—I don’t think she notices she’s doing it.
“The best thing you can do is allow her the time and space to get used to the idea of you. You’re walking into her life as a stranger and in a way replacing someone she was attached to. That can’t be easy. Just be open and understanding with her. Don’t have any expectations.”
I scratch the back of my head. “I’m in way over my head with this.”
“But you’re serious about Natalie? Taking on another man’s child isn’t an easy task.”
“I’m more serious than ever,” I say. “Natalie is incredible, and if being with her means having Kylie in my life too, I’ll do whatever it takes to make it work.”
Mom smiles. “You’re such a decent man, Mason.”
She breathes harder, her face paling. She leans forward a little.
“Mom?” I ask. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m fine, I’m fine,” she says, but her voice is thin, and she gasps for air.
“Where’s your machine?” I ask.
“In the room,” Mom says. She has an oxygen machine the doctors insisted we have at home for something like this. I jump up and run to the room, getting the machine from its storage place. When I get back to the living room, Mom has fallen to the side on the couch. She’s blue around her lips and her eyes are closed.
“Mom!” I run to her. When I shake her, her body’s limp. I hold my hand in front of her nose.
She’s not breathing at all.
The machine isn’t going to do much now.
I scoop her up and she weighs almost nothing in my arms. When I get her frail form strapped into the seatbelt and hop in behind the wheel, I make a call to the hospital to let them know we’re coming. Then I call my dad at the office to tell him where we are.
“We’re going to take care of this, Mom,” I say as I fly around corners, cars honking when I nearly run them off the road. “You just hold on. We’re almost there.”
Police sirens start up behind me.
“Fuck!” I slam the wheel with both hands before I pull over.
