Page 93 of Was I Ever Here

This time we’re letting the pain fade

“Thank you,” I say softly before catching his lips with mine, his hand circling my waist. When we pull away to catch our breath, he smiles.

“There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, my little sun…in this life and the next.”

Chapter 54

Sunny

One month later

Thebellclangsoverthe coffee shop door, prompting me to look up from the book I’m reading. Lenix in all her glory strolls in like the vision she is. Effortlessly gorgeous in a summer dress, wedge sandals, and soft pink lipstick. Her long black hair is pulled into a high ponytail as if I hadn’t just woken her up less than half an hour ago to ask her to meet me here.

She winks at me from across the coffee shop, stopping at the counter to place her order first. When she reaches our table, she leans down and gives me a quick peck on the cheek before sitting down in front of me.

“Morning gloomy baby,” she says with a smirk, crossing one long leg over the over.

“Are you ever going to stop calling me that?” I ask with exasperation.

She shrugs, her smile big and bright. “We’ll see,” she sing-songs but then falls silent as the barista comes over with her order. She keeps her eyes on me as if she’s sizing me up and I squirm in my seat.

When the waiter walks away she finally asks, “How are you?”

“Good.”

She quirks an eyebrow. “Are you really? Or are you just saying that.”

I roll my eyes. “I swear Lenix, I’m doing better. Not perfect, but better.” I chew on my bottom lip. “I’m going back to therapy.”

Lenix's face brightens and my heart swells. “Are you really?” she says, her voice all fucking hopeful and I can’t help but to smile.

“Yeah, I have my first appointment next week,” I reply nervously.

Rationally, I know this is a good thing, I know I need help. Help that’s bigger than just the love and support of Lenix and Byzantine. But emotionally, I still feel like a gremlin hissing at anyone who tries to get too close to the thoughts and feelings I’d rather keep secret.

I’ll probably hate every second of it. But it’s better than the alternative. I tried that and it sucks. The only way out is through—as they say.

“My baby’s all grown up,” Lenix jokes, pretending to wipe the corner of her eyes.

“Omg I hate you, stop. You’re so embarrassing.”

She laughs and takes a tentative sip of her latte.

“Anyway, you’re one to talk. You sure you don’t wanna come with? Discuss your, oh I don’t know, commitment issues?” I volley back.

Lenix acts shocked and tongues her cheek, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“First of all, how dare you, I’m perfect. Second of all, I’m curious…” She taps her finger as if deep in thought trying to decipher something, and I already know where this is going before the words come out of her mouth. “Have you told Byzantine you love him yet?”

I don’t even bother defending myself. “Did I mention I hate you?”

Lenix lets out an evil cackle, a smug little pout on her face and settles into her chair like she won a prize.

“Okay but seriously,” she says, staring me down with her big brown eyes. “What are you even waiting for? You guys are practically married at this point. It’s kind of gross to be honest.”

“Okay wow, chill. That’s not evencloseto the truth.” I mean, we do spend all our time together and I basically stay over every night but that’s it really.

Lenix laughs, tonguing her cheek, satisfied with making me sweat.

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