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“Are you sure everything is okay, love?” Mum pressed.
I wanted to tell her I’d met someone. But what was there to tell her? That I’d just had sex with a man who was meant to be untouchable? That he’d told me he liked me and I didn’t know what to do about that, since every option seemed to end with giving up him or my career. And even if we could be together, when I went back to London, how would our relationship last long distance?
And I was questioning why I cared so much for this promotion. In fact, I’d spent most of the afternoon resenting the promotion, my job and the firm, not what we’d done today. No, I had no regrets about today. The value I’d long put on this promotion seemed hollow now and had been replaced with a powerful need to see Stuart again, to be with him again.
How could I talk to her with no underwear on because he’d ripped them off and I was so consumed with thinking about him I hadn’t even thought to put on a new pair?
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I mumbled.
“Amanda Henrietta Turner, you are the worst liar I’ve met.” Mum stated, causing me to look up. She smiled softly. “You can tell me if anything is wrong. You know that, don’t you, Henny Penny?”
I managed a small smile even if she had used my nickname, thanks to the abomination of a middle name inspired by a Turner family ancestor.
I couldn’t bear the idea of telling my family that I had put my job in jeopardy with a stupid, hormonal impulse and would be quite possibly heading home soon, with my tail tucked between my legs.
How would I get a job in Australia when I lost mine here because I’d slept with a client, in his office, no less?
I took a deep breath, hoping to hide my distress. “Mum, you chose to marry Dad and have kids over a career. Did you regret it?”
Mum gave me a wry look. “My eldest girl is asking me if I regret having her.”
“No, no,” I laughed nervously. “I meant, how did you know you’d be happier on the farm and not being a teacher?”
Mum smiled. “Because a job doesn’t love you back. And, your father was more than happy for me to work. In fact, I did some relief teaching when Ryan was tiny. I fell pregnant with you and I liked being a mother, staying at home to care for you and Ryan. It was never a ‘him or the job’ kind of decision, love. I chose to learn how to manage the farm because I wanted to be a partner in all things with your Dad.”
Mum tilted her head. “You don’t think I had to choose one over the other, did you?
Her question clanged in my mind. Had I believed my mother had made an all or nothing choice all my life? How did I not know this about Mum and Dad?
“What’s prompted these questions?” Mum’s face lit up. “Have you met a fella?”
A knock came from the shared door between Stuart’s flat and mine.
“Oh, I have to go,” I answered, my voice shaky.
“Alright, well, send me a message later okay.”
“I’ll send the files later today,” Ryan promised. “Catch ya, Hen!”
I nodded. “Yes to message. Love you, Mum. Bye Ryan.”
I hung up, and faced the door between our rooms, summoning the courage to face my fate.
Chapter Eleven
Stuart
I rested my head against the wall and knocked on the door. Caroline had texted Amanda when I’d left her place, saying I was on my way back to the flat in an Uber.
All Amanda had texted back was she was ready to talk.
I didn’t know if that was a good sign, or a bad one.
Amanda made a sound on the other side. Then silence for what seemed like eternity until I heard her voice, breathy and soft.
“Hello, Stuart.”
I swallowed hard.
