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Tucker
Just like every night, I sit outside her home and watch their lives go on without me. I can’t wait until Mari’s birthday party when I can see Sydney again. I want to hold her in my arms. I want to demand that she take me back, but I can’t. Until she comes to me and tells me what’s going on, I can’t give her any more of myself. She already has all of me. She has my heart and my soul. When Mrs. Mayson stopped at the jobsite to visit with Asher today, she mentioned she was going to see Sharon and her granddaughter, and I knew I had to try to see them. I missed Mari and I’m glad I did crash their meeting. Asher knew what I was up to as soon as I said I had to take off for a bit.
Mari saw me before the women did and stood up shaking her arms at me. I almost choked with pride seeing her try to take a couple of steps toward me. I swung her up in my arms and nuzzled her in close to me. Her cute little smile with a couple of teeth showing told me how much I’ve already missed in the nine days since I left.
When I first left Sydney’s house, I said I wasn’t going to stay away for long. But then I decided for us to move forward, Sydney would need to tell me more about her past. She knows everything about me, and I don’t know the most important things about her. She won’t talk about Mari’s dad, and I think it’s not because she loved him but despised him. How could she have the child of a man she despised? Those are questions I want answered.
I watch the lights go off in each room as she prepares to go to bed. Her mom left an hour ago. She waved at me as she drove by. I’m not fooling Sharon or anyone for that matter. Only Sydney doesn’t know where I spend my nights. I pull out my cell and text her.
Me: Goodnight, spitfire. Sweet dreams. Kiss my marshmallow for me. I miss you.
I started calling Mari marshmallow shortly after Sydney and I got together. Mari smushes herself against me as if she’s trying to meld us together. It’s a feeling I missed until today when she hugged me again. She hugs with everything in her.
I look back at my phone and notice she still hasn’t messaged back when I see the light flick on in the office. I watch her as she sits at her desk. She needs curtains on those windows. She pulls on a pair of glasses I’ve only seen her wear a few times. The dark rims would look ugly on some people, but not on her. They make me think of a sexy librarian. She is looking at something on the computer and then I see her hold up photos. I want to move closer but I don’t want her to know. She finally picks up her cell phone and looks at it. Her glasses are perched on the tip of her nose.
Spitfire: Night, Tucker. I miss you too.
That’s the first time she’s acknowledged missing me. I tell her every night I miss her, but she usually just says goodnight and that’s the end of it.
Spitfire: I wish you were here.
Me: I wish that too.
Spitfire: If I asked, would you come to me?
Me: In a heartbeat, but this time I want to know.
I watch as she pauses. She lays her glasses on the desk and drops her head. She stays like that for a moment and then stands up. She moves out of the office and turns off the light. I watch as more lights go off and on. I look at my phone when it chimes indicating she set her alarm, and I know she’s going to bed now. I know from watching her that she doesn’t sleep very much. I also know she stopped seeing her counselor. I’m about to drift off when a tap on my window has me turning. I look over and nod as Wes opens the door.
“You need to get some sleep. I’ve got one of the guys here. You go get some rest tonight and he’ll take over.”
“I can’t leave her.”
“You aren’t. Let your brothers help you.”
I drop my chin to my chest knowing he’s right. I’ve done this so many times that I won’t be able to function soon if I don’t get some good sleep. But therein lies the main problem. How do I get good sleep when I’m not with her? When her body isn’t pressed against mine? I’ve grown used to her next to me. What if she has a nightmare and needs me? I don’t voice any of this though.
“Okay.” I give in.
I start up my truck and head back to the clubhouse and the bed I hate sleeping in. Because even that bed had her in it at times. She’s everywhere in my life and yet not. I need to get her back. I need to make this right.
CHAPTER11
SYDNEY
“This is going to be an epic first birthday with all your planning.” Lydia laughs at me as I change from my uniform into a pair of black slacks, a cream and black polka-dot sleeveless blouse, and black with cream heels. My ankle is going to kill me later, but I want to look professional when I meet this man. I don’t know who he is, but I know he has to be the man in the video clips. I know he’s cultured, and I won’t have him making me feel inferior. I’m fairly certain he’s the reason my team was attacked.
I pull my hair from the bun and let it fall down my back. I brush it out, letting the waves created from the bun give it a slight bend. I look at myself in the mirror and try to ignore Lydia. I hate keeping secrets from her and everyone, but I’m doing this to protect them.
“Hey, do I need to worry you are getting another job, or are you meeting a lunch date?” She waves her hand at my outfit.
I finally look at her through the mirror. “Nope, my employment with you is secure. Just want to look more put together than usual.”
“Why?”
“Just because.”
She moves to stand next to me at the counter. “Syd, tell me what’s going on. I know you asked Tucker to move out. I know you are going through something more.”
