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Iwake up with a start, the tightness in my lungs jolting me upright as I immediately start coughing. It feels like a vice is wrapped around my chest and I’m struggling to suck in enough air just to breathe.
“Here,” Delaney says, thrusting the inhaler I dug out of my backpack yesterday at me.
I nod in thanks, unable to voice it out loud as I cough and cough like I’m a two pack a day smoker. Taking the inhaler from her hands, I shake it quickly, still coughing as I stick it in my mouth and attempt to inhale. The first go is pretty useless as I cough it straight back out, my hand falling to the mattress as she now hands me some water.
“Try this first,” she says, her voice filled with worry.
I glance up at her, trying for a smile even as I take the water bottle, having small sips so I don’t spit it out all over the place as I try to stop coughing. Eventually I manage to get a couple of mouthfuls down, the coughing finally subsiding.
“Better?” Delaney asks.
I give a nod, even though I don’t really feel much better. It’s not like I have a sore throat or anything. Whatever this is, it’s in my lungs. But even as I finally suck in a lungful of the inhaler, I don’t get much relief from it. It’s weird, because on the rare occasion I do get a hit of asthma, a couple of puffs on this always helps me out.
This time though, it’s barely making a dent, my lungs still feeling heavy and full, so that even breathing feels like a struggle against the weight that’s sitting on them.
But I don’t tell Delaney any of this, taking another hit of the inhaler before propping the pillows up behind me so I can lean back against them. It feels a little easier to breathe when I’m sitting up.
“This seems to be a bit more serious than a common cold,” she says, sitting down beside me and pulling my hand into her lap.
I squeeze her fingers in mine. “Yeah, maybe,” I admit with a shrug. “I’ll be alright though,” I tell her, trying for a smile. “At least my fever seems to have gone.”
“Hmmm,” Delaney says, brushing her thumb across my knuckles. I can tell she doesn’t really believe me and to be honest, I’m not sure I believe me either.
I don’t ever remember feeling like this before, not when I was a kid or as an adult. I’ve certainly never struggled to breathe like I am now.
“Do you want some tea?” she asks, gesturing to the pot on the stove. She’s had some pine needle tea brewing since yesterday, constantly forcing me to drink it by the cupful. I know she’s worried I’m going to get dehydrated, and as much as I’m really starting to hate the taste of this shit, I keep swallowing it down just to stop her from worrying.
“Thanks,” I say with a smile, letting go of her hand as she gets me a cup.
I blow on the hot liquid as she also grabs some of those weird ass mushrooms that taste like VapoRub. They aren’t really doing a whole lot to help, but it can’t hurt either.
“How are you doing?” I ask, as she sits back down beside me. She’s got dark circles under her eyes, the kind that tell me she’s not really getting much sleep. “My coughing is keeping you awake, huh?” I add, gesturing toward her.
She offers me a sad smile, taking my hand again. “Worrying about you is keeping me awake,” she says. “Do you think…”
I take another mouthful of tea, inhaling the piney scent in an attempt to dislodge whatever the fuck this is in my lungs. “Do I think what?”
Delaney takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly as she meets my gaze. “Do you think this might be something serious?” she asks. “Maybe pneumonia or something?”
I take another sip of tea, stalling with my answer because I don’t want to worry her any more than I already am. I have no idea if that’s what’s happening with me right now, maybe it’s pneumonia or maybe it’s a chest infection. It’s definitely more than just a cold and if I had to guess, I’d probably say I need something a little stronger than ibuprofen or Tylenol to take care of this.
“I don’t know, Laney,” I admit. “Maybe a chest infection?”
She nods, her gaze dropping, but not far enough that I don’t see the lone tear that now slides down her cheek. Putting my mug on the floor beside the mattress, I tug on her hand, pulling her closer as I wrap my arms around her.
“Hey, it’s gonna be okay,” I tell her. “I already told you you’re stuck with me, remember?”
She nods again but doesn’t say anything and when I tilt my head, I see more tears on her cheeks. It fucking breaks my heart to see her this worried, that after everything we’ve gone through, this is now happening.
Plus, I should be the one looking after her, not the other way around and as grateful as I am that she is taking care of me, I’m fucking pissed this has happened in the first place.
“Laney,” I say softly, tilting her face up to mine. I brush the tears away with my thumb, kissing the end of her nose. “We’re going to get through this,” I tell her. “I promise we’ll get through this.”
“You’re so sick,” she whispers, biting her bottom lip as her eyes fill with tears again.
I try to suck in a breath, the crackle in my lungs loud enough that both of us hear it. “I’m okay,” I lie, offering her a smile. “And look, it’s finally stopped snowing,” I add, tipping my head toward the one window we have left. “No snow means they can start to look for us.”
She nods again before resting her head on my shoulder. I tighten my arms around her, even as she picks up my mug of tea and holds it out, telling me she wants me to drink. With a chuckle, I take it, knowing I will do whatever she wants me to do right now. Anything to stop her from worrying too much.
